


Blue & Gold

by half_sour_saffitz



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:02:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 34,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23032921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/half_sour_saffitz/pseuds/half_sour_saffitz
Summary: Katara and Zuko were born onto opposite sides of a war-ravaged world. Survival in their crystal prison means relying on one another. Relying on one another means opening doors that were meant to stay locked. Once opened, the doors are hard to shut again.
Relationships: Katara/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 34
Kudos: 192
Collections: Avatar the Last Airbender, Avatar: The Last Airbender





	1. Prisoners (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Prisoners _

The solid rock wall shook. A seam appeared and split. Zuko threw himself towards the widening gap. 

“Azula! Let me out!” 

The silhouette of a girl appeared, and in the shadows of her face, Zuko cast the sharp cheekbones and cruel smirk he expected to see. But when the eerie green light of his prison cell illuminated her, the lines of her face softened and transformed, showing him the girl who was really there. Shock, confusion, and outrage crossed Katara’s features in quick succession. 

“No!” she screamed. She turned back towards her captors but one of the brutal rock hands of Dai Li caught her on the cheek. She went down, falling into the cell, into Zuko. Zuko reached out to brace her fall. But she stumbled and caught herself, glaring at his outstretched hands. By the time she turned around, the wall was solid and featureless again. 

Zuko slammed a fist against it anyways and howled his sister’s name. 

“She’s not here.” 

Zuko turned to see that Katara had already adopted a fighting stance. The water from the underground river stood in a silent wave behind her, ready to crest and obliterate him. The place where the Dai Li had hit her was already swelling and a thin line of blood had appeared. Zuko sunk to the floor. 

“She didn’t come,” he said to his knees. 

“Why are you here?” Katara barked, the wave still in place. 

_ Because I’m a traitor. Because my sister has no soul. Because I can’t help but ruin a good thing _ . But he couldn’t say any of that to the waterbender. She hated him. It almost made him want to laugh. They were stuck in a cell together, both prisoners. Yet she still wanted to drown him.

“Why are  _ you  _ here?” Zuko spat. “Cuz you’re a  _ prisoner _ .” Disgust puckered Zuko’s lips. 

“Why are the Dai Li working for the Fire Nation?” 

Zuko shrugged. “Azula can be… persuasive.” 

A tendrid of water slapped his face. Zuko jumped to his feet. 

“Hey!” 

Katara took several deep breaths, shoulder heaving up and down. Blood was dripping off her face but she made no move to treat it. Both hands were fists, directed at him. Zuko wondered if she would prefer to hit him directly; was using water too removed for the kind of hatred she had? 

Her eyes darted around the cell, though her gaze never strayed from him for long. Katara’s irises flicked several times to the tunnel off to the right. There were no glowing green rocks there, only darkness. 

Katara broke the stillness with a quick shift of her hips and a slash of her hand. The wave toppled, split neatly around Katara, and kept splitting, forming into icy shards. Zuko swung his leg around in a sloppy arc, blasting the air with heat. A few icicles melted at his feet, but most were obliterated. Katara was already dashing down the underground hallway. Water from the creek leapt to follow her. 


	2. Mothers (Katara)

Katara

_ Mothers _

Katara sprinted down the dark hallway until the green light truly faded. Then she forced herself to slow down to a jog. She strained her ears to hear the sound of his footsteps behind her, but there was nothing. She took a few deep breaths.  _ Stay calm, stay calm, stay calm _ . Zuko was a formidable enemy. He was powerful, full of rage and hate -- like Aang when he went into the Avatar state. But unlike Aang in the Avatar state, Zuko had control over himself. He was dangerous. At times, it had been split-second reactions that had saved them from his clutches. Katara remembered meeting up with him and the pirates. She had been bending with no regard for form or strategy. It was all desperate reactions. Her master would have been ashamed. 

_ Stay calm. Panic gets you nothing. Think _ . 

Zuko was at a distinct advantage in the dark -- but he couldn’t make a move until he was close enough to strike. If she just kept alert and and listening, he wouldn’t be able to get close. 

Katara decided that stealth was better than speed and slowed to a silent walk. There was no sound and no light. Fear began to bubble in her chest, threatening to overwhelm her. It reminded her of being trapped in the Cave of Two Lovers when the candles were going out. But then she had been with Aang. It was hard to be truly afraid with the Avatar, with her friend. Fear was much easier alone -- with the prince of the Fire Nation.  _ Stay calm _ . The passage seemed to be going down, deeper into the earth. The hairs on her arms were standing up and she was constantly worried about tripping over pebbles on the invisible slope beneath her feet. 

She must have been walking for a quarter of an hour. Maybe longer, time was hard in the dark, when she became aware that her environment had changed. She reached out her arms and confirmed that she was no longer in the confining tunnel. The air flowed freely around her, making her think she was somewhere large. If only she could test an echo… 

Katara wound up and sent a peach-sized drop of water sailing maybe twenty meters. The splash was quiet and hollow. Katara began to think that she was in a huge cavern. It took the better part of an hour to confirm. She had to double back in order to find the wall, and then she kept a hand against the rock face as she circumnavigated the room. There were a few times when she thought she found another tunnel leading out, but they turned out to be large alcoves. It was clear that this was not a natural cave, at least not anymore. The walls were smooth and met the floor at right angles. The alcoves featured intricate sculpting and details, though they were empty. Eventually, Katara realized that the room was circular, and her investigation was leading her back to the tunnel that lead to Zuko. Despair and panic started to cloud her judgement. She let go of the wall and folded down to the floor. The darkness felt like a physical thing. It pressed on her brain on her eyes. Colorful shapes floated on the edges of her vision, but when she focused on them, they were gone. 

She needed light. She would go insane without it. And that meant returning to the original cell. That meant returning to Zuko. 

When she finally found her way back, the dim light emitted by the phosphorescent stone seemed blinding. Zuko was sitting, back against the wall. He made no move to get up when he saw her. Nonetheless she kept the water surrounding her arms vigilant.

“Found the giant dead end?” Zuko asked. She didn’t respond. “You can drop the tsunami arms,” Zuko said. “It must be exhausting.” 

It was. Katara had been holding water for over an hour now. She could feel sweat on her forehead. 

“And you’re gonna want to save your strength,” Zuko continued. “There’s no food.” 

The water fell. Katara controlled it so it slithered back into the river, though she didn’t think she convinced Zuko that it was a voluntary release. 

“Why are you here?” she asked him. He was going to hurt her now that she had weakened herself. They had chosen these caverns to exhaust her. He didn’t need to follow her into the tunnel. It was all just a trap. 

“I told you, I’m Azula’s prisoner too.” 

No. He was here to torture her. They would keep her in the dark with her enemy. Not only would she be weak physically, she’d be weak mentally. She summoned some water to a pool at her feet. Katara felt better with water close. 

“Azula is your sister.” 

Zuko snorted. A lock of hair flew away from his face making his scar more visible. “I’d forgotten.” 

There was real bitterness in his voice. No. No, it wasn’t real. He was acting. Using all that anger to make it sound real and confuse her. Despair condensed in her throat. Katara couldn’t do this alone. If she had Aang or Sokka, or Toph. Her nose began to tickle. She wanted to be a regular kid, with her dad and her Gran to protect her from the hard things. Tears pricked at her eyelids like hot needles. She wanted her mom.

“Hey, are you okay?” 

Through blurry eyes, Katara saw Zuko getting to his feet, extending an arm towards her. 

She moved instinctively. His arm she slapped away with a thick stream of water. She froze his ankles to the ground before realizing what a stupid use of time and energy that was. She had to be smarter when fighting a firebender. She should surround him in water, make firebending impossible, drown him… It was the only way to actually be safe. 

But he wasn’t moving. He made no move to melt his bindings. He cradled his arm to his chest. Zuko’s hair covered his face. 

“Can you please stop?” 

Katara still couldn’t see his face but his voice trembled.  _ Don’t fall for it _ . “Did you stop? When you were hunting Aang? Did your people stop when they raided my village?! Only after you’d killed my  _ mother _ . Tell me why I shouldn’t kill you now.” 

Zuko peered up at her. He winced. His wrist was broken. “I don’t know. Why haven’t you?” 

_ Aang wouldn’t like it _ . “I could still. I haven’t made up my mind.” 

Zuko retreated behind his hair again. “The Fire Nation took my mother from me too.” Katara recognized the heaviness in his voice. The somber tone of a kid trying not to cry. And she hated him for it. 

“Don’t lie!” Katara was alarmed by the tone of her voice. She sounded truly unhinged. Zuko would know that she was breaking down. What if there were Dai Li -- or Azula -- hidden in the shadows beyond the cell? They would come streaming now. 

The tunnels remained silent. 

“I’m not lying. I haven’t seen my mother in six years.” When Katara didn’t respond, Zuko started talking quickly. “It was right before my father ascended to the throne. She put me to bed and then in the morning she wasn’t there. My father never mentioned her again. He wouldn’t answer my questions. Azula … she… And my uncle… he wouldn’t tell me anything either. But he was crying when I asked him. No one has ever told me what happened to my mother. They all act like she never existed!” 

A teardrop fell from Zuko’s face. He spoke quickly like he had no control over the words, like it was the first time he had said them. When he got to the last sentence, fire bloomed from his mouth. Katara was truly freaked. 

She melted the ice securing him to the floor. 

“Your mother disappeared six years ago?” 

Zuko looked up at her, surprised by the change in her voice. Tears were streaming down her face, but otherwise she could have been carved from expressionless stone. His eyes were puffy and he sniffled.

“And you’ve been traveling the world looking for  _ Aang _ ?” 

Katara’s voice was as cold as the feeling that enveloped Zuko’s heart. That’s when he stopped fighting and let the sobs shake his chest and echo through the cavern. 


	3. Drowning (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Drowning _

Zuko felt hollow. He had stopped crying. Katara hadn’t said a word to him. She sat with her arms crossed at the mouth of the tunnel. He sat as far away from her as possible. His wrist throbbed and had swollen to twice its size. Occasionally he dipped it in the river, but pins and needles quickly and unpleasantly gathered in his fingers and he would have to remove them. 

Thoughts of his mother swam through his mind without any direction. He viewed memories for the first time since she had disappeared -- things he didn’t know he still remembered. Walking around the palace gardens, story time before bed, using his fledgling firebending to heat her tea. 

What Katara had said had cut to the bone. But what hurt worse was that he had never thought of it. Katara had put two and two together within moments. But Zuko, who had hurt for years, never even considered going to find his mother. It was like he wanted her to be dead. It was easier for him. 

Zuko was filled with revulsion and leaned over to wretch into the river. Without thinking, he put his broken wrist out to support his body. It instantly collapsed under his weight and he fell face first into the river. He felt himself slipping down the steep bank, his whole torso submerged. The current pulled at his robe. The thought of letting the water take him crossed Zuko’s mind. 

_ Then Katara wouldn’t have a guilty conscience about my drowning.  _

But before he could decide to pull himself up, the water pushed him out. Katara stood above him, arms crossed, as he coughed on his back. 

“Let me see your wrist,” she said. 

Zuko curled up to cover his weak side. Katara rolled her eyes and used the water still clinging to his body to turn him over again. She knelt down and grabbed his wrist. Zuko was ashamed that a pained moan escaped his lips. Katara surrounded his wrist in a water cast. Relief began to seep in through the skin. Zuko’s eyes rolled back. 

When she was done she returned to her corner. 

“Thank you,” Zuko whispered. 

“Don’t kill yourself before I decide whether or not to do it myself.”


	4. Sauna (Katara)

Katara

_Sauna_

How long had she been underneath Ba Sing Se? Katara’s stomach ached, her head pounded, and every blink of her eyes was longer than the last. She needed sleep but she couldn’t sleep. Not here, not with him. He had made no move to attack her. The only fire he had produced had been in self-defense and anguish. Otherwise, he had stayed away from her. She had broken his wrist and he hadn’t said a word… 

_They’re waiting for me to fall asleep!_ Katara jumped to her feet and paced back and forth. “How long have you been down here?” 

Zuko seemed not to hear her for a moment. “A day?” 

“Did they give you any food?” 

He shook his head. 

_Lie_. 

“Are they gonna starve us?”

Zuko shrugged. “My sister probably wouldn’t care. But my dad wouldn’t be pleased if Azula killed me. So… I don’t know.” 

“Your sister wouldn’t _care_?” 

He snorted. “We can’t all be ‘Katara and Sokka’ type of siblings.” 

Katara fumed to hear her brother’s name coming out of his mouth. She didn’t say anything more to him and he remained silent as well. Katara paced for as long as she could, but she eventually had to sit down. She was starting to feel dizzy. Maybe a short nap… She’d wake up more alert. 

“You can’t sleep here.” 

Katara sat up. 

“The stone, it’s too cold. You won’t wake up.” 

Katara rolled her eyes. “Maybe you forgot… I’m from the _South Pole_.” 

“And would you ever sleep on naked ice?” Zuko demanded. 

_No_. Ice would suck the heat out of your body. You wouldn’t even wake up to realize that you were dying. But this rock couldn’t be like ice, could it?

“Believe me,” said Zuko. “One of the first lessons firebenders learn is about staying warm. It’s not like the other elements, where you can use your surroundings to bend. Fire comes from within and if you’re frozen cold -- it doesn’t come at all.” 

Katara got to her feet. 

“These cells were originally for firebending prisoners, I think,” Zuko continued. His voice was dead and expressionless. “If Azula has made any mistakes, it was sending a waterbender down to a prison cell with a water source.” 

“Maybe she hoped I’d drown you.” 

Zuko said nothing but Katara realized that in trying to be cruel, she may have guessed correctly. It made her sick that these siblings were so callous to each other. 

“So what? Are we supposed to freeze to death? Starve to death?” Katara realized that she was trying to distract Zuko from thoughts of pain. It wasn’t the cold or the hunger that would kill her down here, it was her compassion. 

“If we had something to burn, we could sleep for a few hours next to the fire. At least enough to get an edge back.” That made it sound like Zuko was preparing to fight whenever the door opened. But who would he be fighting? “But it’s a firebender cell,” Zuko continued. “No wood. Nothing flammable.” 

An idea sprouted in Katara’s mind. “What about rocks?” 

Zuko looked at her for the first time. “Rocks don’t burn.” 

“Yeah, I’m not an idiot. But if we could warm some rocks, we could pour water on them.” Katara spoke as she thought. “It would be like a sauna. But we would need some sort of enclosed space or the warmth would disappear before absorbing into the stone.” 

Zuko hopped to his feet. 

Katara tensed, but he jogged past her towards the tunnel. He didn’t even look at her as he disappeared into the darkness, a fireball springing up in his hand.

“Here!” Zuko’s voice echoed from deep in the tunnel. 

Katara grabbed some water before following Zuko into the dark. When she found his light, he was crouched next to a small cleft in the tunnel wall. It was short, neither could go much higher than sitting inside, but they could both fit. 

Zuko transferred his fireball to his mouth, feeding it with his breath and he reached down to undo his robe. He shivered in the cold, goosebumps springing up on his bare chest. Zuko held his robe up to the cavern entrance. It didn’t fit exactly, but it would stop the hot air from disappearing all at once. 

Zuko and Katara looked at each other for a long moment. Then they moved together to the large cavern to gather small stones. Zuko illuminated their way with one hand and held the rocks that Katara collected in his arm. They transferred their collection to the cave. Katara left Zuko blasting the place with fire and ran back to the original cavern to collect water. 

As she pulled water from the creek, she felt something disturb the current. She peered into the water, but it was black. Ribbons of green light undulated slowly in the weak current. Blindly she reached down into the depths and seized what was moving. It wriggled free when it sensed something was off, but Katara was persistent. She pulled it up to the surface. 

“Eugh.” It was the ugliest water creature she had ever seen. It was some sort of an eel with a black, slick body that twisted frantically. It appeared to be completely blind. There were spots where it might have once had eyes, but by this point they were empty sockets, covered in the same slimy flesh as the rest of the thing. Katara killed it quickly and brought it along with three large bricks of ice. 

Zuko held a fireball up, waiting for her return. 

“Hungry?” she asked, holding up her catch. 

Zuko made the same face she must have made, but he nodded. 

“I hear firebenders are pretty good cooks.”

His face cracked into a grin. 

_Calm down_ , Katara commanded herself. But it was no good. Having purpose down here had filled her with a giddy feeling. Her exhaustion was pushed away, but she knew it was temporary. She was still tired, and hungry, and imprisoned. She wouldn’t let herself forget. 

Zuko heated a small slate piece that had fallen from the wall and fried the eel on that. 

“Can you freeze this to the wall, so it’s a curtain?” he asked her, gesturing to his robe. 

“It will melt after a while.” 

Zuko shrugged, implying that ‘there was no ideal in this situation.’

Katara set up the robe as a makeshift tent and made to crawl inside. 

“No!” Zuko called. “It’s too hot.” 

Katara laid a careful hand on the stone floor and pulled it away quickly. The amount of fire it would have taken to heat this stone up to burning made Katara doubt her temporary alliance. Zuko had been down her longer than her, and yet he was still extremely powerful. 

_What am I doing?_ Exhaustion settled down on her brain again making it hard to think. _I have to sleep. I don’t have a choice. But… I’ll wake up before him. He won’t catch me._

The eel was finished cooking. Zuko tore it’s rubbery flesh in half and handed her a portion. It smelled odd, but Katara’s mouth watered anyways. She tore off a portion with her teeth and swallowed. An inadvertent moan escaped her throat as food hit her stomach. Mortified, she glanced at Zuko. He stared back at her and they both giggled. The eel was gone in a minute. Katara thought she was probably still hungry, but even a little food felt amazing. Now, fatigue was the most pressing concern. Zuko lifted up the flap and crawled in their shelter. He sighed. 

Katara crept forward hesitantly. It was still hot. 

“How can you stand that?” she asked. 

Zuko smiled sleepily. “It’s amazing.”

Katara spent time breaking off portions of ice and placing them on the pile of hot stones Zuko had made. Soon the cave was filled with heavy, moist air. It felt incredible. 

“Are you thirsty?” Katara asked. 

“Huh?” Zuko was already half asleep. But he nodded and propped himself up to receive a few gulps of water. 

There was nothing left to do but get into the shelter. Katara felt hesitant. She nervously released the ties of her outer robe so that she would have something between her and the hot stones. She had done this thousands of times in front of Aang, Sokka, and Toph, and she had never felt self-conscious. But this was different, this was releasing her last layer of protection in front of her greatest enemy. 

_You’re going to sleep in an enclosed cave next to a firebender. If he wants to hurt you, a dress isn’t going to save you_ , she told herself. She pulled the robe from her shoulders and laid it out on her half of the cave. Zuko didn’t seem to notice her. The pile of hot stones separated them. 

“It’s gonna be dark,” he said. “I can’t hold this while I’m asleep.” 

Katara nodded. She laid down and closed her eyes. She was aware when it went dark. She acted out what sleeping looked like. She curled her legs up and folded her arms under her head, but her muscles remained tense. 

“Goodnight.” Her voice was uncertain.

“Night,” said Zuko, his voice thicker. 

Katara wanted to remain vigilant, but the hot air soothed her sore muscles. Heat from the floor seeped through her robe. And when Zuko began to snore gently, she lost the fight. 


	5. While You Were Sleeping (Zuko)

Zuko

_ While You Were Sleeping _

Zuko woke up a few hours after falling asleep. It was cold. Katara had pulled her dress to surround her, and she was more used to sleeping in the cold than he was. He heated the stones again as much as he dared, but it wouldn’t make the floor and walls hot again. He didn’t want to wake Katara while she still slept peacefully. He laid a gentle hand on her shoulder to make sure she was still warm. He withdrew quickly when he determined that she was fine. He groped outside for one of the ice blocks Katara had left. It was still mostly frozen and Zuko placed it on the hot stones. The steam-filled air was better. 

Zuko pulled his knees to his chest and sat in the dark. Ever since he was a little kid, he had hated the dark. He hardly ever slept in complete darkness. Azula used to make fun of him. She had never been scared of anything. 

He created the smallest candle flicker, hovering over his index finger. In the small cave there was only one thing to see. Katara. As the air got warmer, she let her dress slip and turned over, so she was facing away from him. Her side curved down from her shoulder and then up again to her hips. Zuko found himself mesmerized by the brown skin of her shoulders. He could see her muscles work as she breathed, and the ridges of her spine tracing down her back. 

Zuko extinguished the flame quickly and turned away from her. He didn’t fall asleep again. Instead he stared into the darkness until he heard her wake up. He laid perfectly still. He listened to the rustling of fabric as she pulled her dress back on. An image of her bare back flashed before his eyes and he clenched his eyes shut, as if he could close the eyes of his brain. Then she was gone. 

Zuko let her get time alone. Then he dismantled the cave. He wrapped his freezing body in his robe and shivered, waiting for warmth to return.


	6. Gold (Katara)

Katara

_Gold_

Katara was disturbed when she woke up. She had slept deeply, so deeply she had little conception of how much time had passed. She was desperately hungry again. Otherwise, nothing else had changed to show the passage of time. 

She resolved not to sleep again. She would power through until their captors came to let them out. Azula had no way to know they had obtained food down here. So unless she truly meant to starve them to death, they would have to be let out soon. 

And of course, by now Aang, Sokka, and Toph would have realized she was gone. If anyone could find her below the ground, it was the blind earthbender. Katara smiled. Toph would find her, and Aang would go into the Avatar state if that’s what it took to get her out. She pictured her rescue -- Aang’s anger, Sokka’s tight hug when they reunited, Toph would probably punch her. What would they say about Zuko? Sokka would argue to close the cell up again, but Aang probably wouldn’t allow them to leave him down here. Without Katara he had no way to get food. Aang was too gentle to let anyone starve to death. 

When Zuko returned to the land of the conscious she was hard at work. Three eels were dead, encased in ice near the creak, and she was working on prying loose a glowing stone. When he showed up, he had his robe on, but Katara found herself tracing the hard lines of his shoulders underneath the fabric. She didn’t want to be alone in the dark again with him. It made her stomach bubble. Besides, she shouldn’t have to depend on him for light. She had not forgotten that this was all probably a trap. A long, convoluted trap.

She worked a small amount of water behind the crystal, freezing and unfreezing it. As the water froze, it expanded, little by little wresting the glowing stone free. The effort was more intense than she had expected and she was sweating. When Zuko joined her, Katara already had a crystal, the size of her hand, hidden in the pockets of her robe. Best to have a few secrets down here. 

“Should I cook some breakfast?” Zuko asked, looking at the eels. 

They ate in silence. 

“So umm, how old are you?” Zuko asked. 

Katara almost laughed. His tone was so awkward and uncertain. She usually heard him yelling things like “release the Avatar” or “I’ll kill your brother if you make one move.” 

“Umm what?” 

“I mean, we can talk, right? Fill up some time?” 

Katara laughed again. “I’m seventeen.” 

“No way.” Zuko waved a hand. “Not true.”

Katara rolled her eyes. “Well I will be… in a year or so.” 

“Fifteen, at the oldest,” Zuko said. 

Katara shrugged. “How old are you?” 

“Sixteen. But I don’t celebrate my birthday anymore. Not since I was banished.” 

Hurt hung in the air. 

“Why were you banished?” Katara found herself asking. 

“I disrespected my father. He gave me this,” Zuko touched his scar, “and sent me away.” 

Katara’s stomach dropped. “That’s terrible.” 

Zuko shrugged. 

“So Aang is your ticket back to the Fire Nation?” 

Zuko nodded. “Maybe.” 

“Maybe?” 

He shrugged again. “I used to just be banished, but when my uncle and I attacked Zhou at the North Pole, we became fugitives. That’s why I’m down here. Azula found us.” 

“That’s why we haven’t seen you in a while! Where have you been hiding?” 

Zuko grinned at her. “Ever heard of a place called Ba Sing Se?” 

Katara sat back. They had been in the same city??

Zuko laughed at her expression. “Don’t worry, we disguised ourselves as refugees. We lived in one of the outer rings, nowhere near the honored position of the Avatar.” 

“Not so honored,” Katara said. 

“What does that mean?” 

“The Earth Kingdom kept us captives as much as guests. We were always watched by a chaperone. And we were never allowed to talk to the Earth King.” 

“The Earth King didn’t want to meet the Avatar?” 

“The king’s a puppet. He doesn’t even know about the war.” 

Hmm, that explained a few things. 

“My uncle opened a tea shop,” Zuko said. 

Katara giggled and saw Zuko smile at the ground. 

“I know, it’s a little silly. But it’s what he always wanted. Do you ever think it’s funny? That we’re born somewhere without any say? My uncle would have been happy to be born into the Earth Kingdom, without any bending abilities, and to have run a tea house for all of his days. But instead he was first in line to the throne of the Fire Nation. His family made him into a warrior. He was an esteemed general, the only one to ever conquer Ba Sing Se. Yet all he wanted from Ba Sing Se was space for a small tea shop and a quiet life.” 

Katara thought about what she knew about Zuko’s Uncle Iroh. Certainly he was gentler than his nephew, but Katara always put that down to age. Iroh was the Dragon of the West. He had conquered Ba Sing Se, then he had been immediately expelled -- costing thousands of lives on both sides. 

“What about you?” Katara asked slowly. “Were you born in the wrong place?”

Zuko was silent for so long he thought she wasn’t going to answer. When he did, it was from behind the curtain of his hair again. “No. I was born in the right place. Fire is anger and rage. That’s me.” 

“But. What about before you were banished? Before your mom disappeared? What about when you were little? No baby is born angry.” 

Zuko refused to open the door in his mind that led to his mother again. “I don’t know. Maybe.” 

Katara knew what she wanted to say next, but she wrestled with herself. She knew she shouldn’t talk about Aang. For the moment, she and the fire prince had an alliance of survival. But when they got out of this cell, they would return to animosity, providence of being born of fire and water. Anything Katara shared could be used against her friend. 

“I wish I knew what you were thinking,” Zuko said softly. 

“I was thinking…” Katara broke. “Aang feels the same way as you. He doesn’t understand why he was selected to be the Avatar. He feels, or he _felt_ like it was a mistake. That’s why he disappeared. He didn’t feel worthy of being the Avatar.” 

Zuko smiled at the ground. “I wanted to be the Avatar when I was little.” 

Katara smiled. All kids want to be the Avatar. 

“I used to pretend as a kid,” he continued. “We all thought that the Avatar had died, maybe a few times, so I thought, you know, maybe it had cycled back to the Fire Nation. Maybe it was me. I would concentrate on rocks and water. I tried jumping off of stuff and flying. Azula made fun of me. She believes that fire is superior, and to want to have anything to do with the other elements is weakness. But my mom told me I would be a great Avatar.” 

“So did mine,” Katara whispered. 

Zuko finally peered out of his hair. 

“By the time I was born, everyone thought that the ability to waterbend had abandoned the Southern Water Tribe. People thought I was some sort of miracle baby.” Katara laughed.

“You kind of were,” Zuko pointed out. “You became the Avatar’s companion and teacher. That’s a pretty special destiny.” 

Katara had nothing to say. Finally she pushed out the question she wanted to ask: “What about you, Zuko? What’s your destiny?” 

He bit his lip and shook his head slightly. Maybe he was having as hard a time trusting her as she was him. “I don’t know. I thought my destiny was to be the Fire Lord. And then I was banished. Then I thought my destiny was to capture the Avatar and restore my honor. But my uncle said I have made choices that have changed that destiny. Now. I don’t know. My uncle wants me to stay here, pretend to be a refugee of the Earth Kingdom. But. I don’t know. That’s not my destiny. I am a firebender. I’m marked.” Zuko tapped the scar again. 

"What if..." Katara's mind drifted to the vial of spirit water from the Northern Water Tribe. "What if you could be healed?" 

"It's a scar."

Katara nodded, but she wondered. The spirit water had special properties, making it a powerful healing agent. How powerful was it? Could it heal wounds inflicted years in the past? If it could, would that finally help Zuko put aside his anger? Katara considered saying all this aloud, but stopped herself. That vial had enough water for one use -- she would have to be crazy to consider spending it on their enemy. And Zuko was her enemy, even if it didn't feel that way at the moment. 

“It would be wrong to hide your bending forever,” said Katara instead. 

Zuko was surprised. “I thought you’d want to hear me give up bending.”

“Bending is part of you. I mean, you shouldn’t use it to hurt people. But, if you stop doing that, then there’s nothing wrong with you being a firebender. To hide it would be to live your life in the darkness.” Katara glared at the ground. “I know. I had to hide my bending -- so that _your_ people wouldn’t come back and hurt my entire village.” 

Silence hung in the space between them like an icy curtain. Zuko didn’t know if he had the courage to shatter it.

“I’m sorry. Truly. You’re right. Hiding your bending -- it's physical, isn’t it? It hurts.” 

“Like a broken wrist?” 

They both laughed. It was a novel sound. It pushed back on the darkness and the cold cave walls.

“That’s the first time you’ve said my name,” Zuko remarked, almost shyly. 

The bubble came back to Katara’s stomach. It was alarming, terrifying, exhilarating. A thousand thoughts raced across her mind in a second. Fears, warnings, desires. Aang, Sokka, Toph, Grangran all cycled through her thoughts. She pushed all of them to the side, and when it was quiet Katara whispered: “Zuko.” 

His hair fell back as he raised his gaze to meet hers. Had she never known that his eyes were gold?

“Katara.” 

Katara’s heart beat in her ears, she kind of felt like she might throw up. He wasn’t looking away. The cave walls disappeared and the glowing green crystals. The world narrowed until he wasn’t there anymore, she wasn’t there anymore, it was just gold. Gold getting closer. Feeling like she was wrenching herself from a deep dream, Katara glanced away quickly, and when she returned, the gold was gone. 


	7. In the Quiet Moments (Zuko)

Zuko

_ In the Quiet Moments _

They passed time slowly. Zuko created a few small fires to warm them. Katara worked a few crystals loose and brought them back to their cave. Zuko took a small one for his pocket. They caught and cooked more eels, though every time he put one to his lips it was more and more disgusting. They went down to the large cavern and explored it together. There were intricately carved pools of water and columns that soared higher than Zuko could illuminate. 

They did a lot of things. They avoided doing others.

They talked but didn’t say much. It was all survival. Heat this, freeze that. They were overly formal and distant. And they never looked at each other. When they accidentally glanced up at the same time, one or both would turn away. Katara addressed the air over Zuko’s right shoulder and Zuko kept his eyes behind his hair. 

Outside of their interpersonal interactions, the caverns remained dank, dark, and unchanged. How long had they been down here? A full day? More. Did Azula really intend to forget about him? It was possible no one would ever find him. Uncle Iroh would think he had just run away. That hurt worse than dying in the dark. 

And then there was Katara. She was clearly still afraid of him. She was never near him without water nearby, though she did so in ways that she thought he wouldn’t see. Everytime she almost looked at him it was a reminder of everything he had done to her, everything he had done to deserve fear. 

He hated that she hated him. And he was confused. A year ago, when he had first seen her in the company of the Avatar, he could not have cared less what she thought of him. He wanted her to fear him. Even when she had been tossed down into the cell with him, it was just human decency that kept him civil. Something his uncle was trying to teach him. 

But now. It was  _ her _ . Katra was the reason he was being nice, wanted to be nice, wanted to be funny so she would laugh. It wasn’t a human being helping a human being survive in unsurvivable conditions. It was Katara. 

But he wasn’t Zuko. Not to her. For the moment, while she needed him, he was a person with the ability to produce heat. A valuable commodity. But when they returned to the surface, he would be the banished prince again. An enemy. He would become his scar and all that it represented. Losing her mother, fear for her people, protecting the Avatar -- all and more were twisted into the uneven, discolored ridges of his face.

Zuko knew this was true. He believed it in his heart and some part of it made him hate her. So why couldn’t he get the image of her sleeping out of his head. Why did he keep returning to it in the quiet moments? Why were there so many damn quiet moments!?

“Katara?” he said, as they sat on the corner of the cavern, now somewhat illuminated by their portable collection of glowing rocks. 

“Yes?” she asked, hesitant. 

“Wanna spar?” 


	8. Spar (Katara & Zuko)

Katara

_ Spar: Part 1 _

No. Absolutely not. She did not want to fight the prince of the Fire Nation down in a cavern where no one knew she was being held. Her friends would never hear from her again! She had to stay calm, be smart, and stay alive so that she could take advantage whenever her situation changed. 

“I’m sure your master told you about practising in varied environments,” Zuko said. Okay, that was basically word-for-word was Pakku had told her. “How many times are you going to be in a place like this long enough to practice? It’ll keep us alert, get the blood flowing. Boredom is the most dangerous enemy when being held captive.” 

“You’re doing a lot of work to convince me to let you throw fireballs at me.” 

Zuko shrugged. “I can practice by myself if it makes you feel better.” 

Practice fighting a firebender? The only practice Katara ever got was when she was actually fighting for her life. She would have killed for a firebending partner to spar with. But did it have to be this partner? 

“Fine,” she said, standing. “You’re on.” 

Zuko jumped to his feet. “Typical sparring rules? No deadly force, fight to yield? No maiming, obviously.” 

Katara shrugged. “I can heal any wounds you can make. If you’re able to make them.” 

_ What the hell was that? _ It was flirting. Katara didn’t know much about boys and dating, but she knew enough to know when she was flirting.  _ Stay calm _ .  _ Stay removed _ . 

Zuko knelt by the side of the glowing ring, his robe laid across his bare shoulders. 

“What are you doing?” 

He smiled at her, full of bravado. “This is how we start duels in the Fire Nation.” He jumped upright, his robe fluttering to the ground in dramatic fashion. Katara rolled her eyes -- and pretended she hadn’t drank in the sight of his shoulders and chest. In a split-second decision threw her own robe to the ground as well. She wasn’t the only one made of flesh and blood. 

They faced off on either side of a glowing green circle they had made. Zuko’s position was low, his hands outstretched towards her, his body turned to the side for minimum available surface area. Katara adopted a tall stance, arms stretched tall. She could feel the water in the pools on either side of her. It vibrated, as if it was a waterfall being held back, dying to break free. 

Zuko was cocky. They hadn’t fought each other in a long time. In that time Katara had become the Avatar’s waterbending master. Zuko grinned and asked, “How do duels start in the water tribes?” 

_ Like this _ . 

  
  


Zuko

_ Spar: Part 2 _

_ Oh shit _ . 

Zuko scrambled to avoid the wave Katara sent crashing over him. He dropped low and pushed out fire, making a narrow space where he was protected. While he defended, Katara attacked, running up a slide of ice and cutting down from the high ground. Zuko melted her platform -- though she had already jumped off. She darted around the circle, making him search for her, defend against his blindspots. 

How long had it been since Katara and Zuko had last tested their bending against each other? Several months at least. In that time she had grown, mentally and physically. Zuko had always felt there was a chance he could win, even when he faced her and her friends together. He had foolishly assumed a one-on-one would be a mild workout. He had assumed wrong. 

She was pushing him towards the edges of the circle, always just out of reach. He needed to gain control. With a few kicks to give him space, Zuko claimed the center and shot arms of fire to either side, successfully trapping her in his field of view. 

With the first volleys taken and reflected, the two combatants settled in for a longer battle. They sparred like a dance, both trying to gain the leading role. They both claimed it for a time, but never long enough to make the other yield. He shot jets of flame, and she extinguished them. She sent waves towards him, and he vaporized them. Their moves were lit with eerie light from below, and sudden bursts of flame. 

Zuko felt his old reflexes returning, along with his fighting mindsets -- all drilled into him before he had the capacity to question them. He had made a mistake early on. Very early on. Before he’d realized they were fighting. In one of his first conversations with Katara he had told her how to destroy a firebender when he warned her against sleeping on the stone floor. 

_ A firebender without warmth is no firebender at all _ . 

That act of compassion could cost him this match if she remembered it. She could rob him of his element and still have plenty of water to splash in. Zuko changed the course of his attacks. Instead of targeting Katara, he blasted her water supply. 

It worked. Katara thought that she was gaining the upper hand. She thought he was merely defending. So she made her attacks bigger and more forceful -- she used up more and more water without ever realizing where it was going. 

Zuko smiled. 

  
  


Katara 

_ Spar: Part 3 _

Katara was surprised by how long the spar had continued. Normally, matches would take a few minutes, if that. But Zuko just kept coming. Even when she gained the upper hand, he resolutely defended against her attacks. 

When the next wave she sent at him  _ clearly _ didn’t have the water she thought it would, he grinned -- and Katara’s heart sank. Yes, she was more powerful than the last time they had battled. But was she smarter? She had fallen into a trap. Zuko knew it; he was waiting for it. 

_ No. No way. I am not losing to a firebender down here. I need water. A  _ _ lot _ _ of it.  _ Condensing would take too much quiet meditation and produce not nearly enough water. She needed a water source. … The creek!

Zuko was smiling a tired, victorious grin. He twisted his hips and realigned his foot at the last second. 

The creek was too far away. But it led somewhere. 

Fire sprouted from Zuko’s fingertips. 

Without thinking, Katara pulled at the water she knew was behind the stone walls of the cavern. She didn’t know where it was or how far away it was. She didn’t have the time to decide and direct the flow. She just pulled. 

Water came through the point of least resistance and washed both of them sideways. They tumbled into each other. Katara locked her arms around Zuko’s torso instinctively, keeping them from scraping against the floor. He held on tight to her arm. 

The wave puddled out and the water source drained away, depositing them on the floor, wet and tangled together. Their lights were scattered throughout the giant cavern, like stars on a moonless night. Zuko’s face was inches from her, still holding onto her arm. 

“You did that?” he asked, out of breath. 

She nodded, too stunned to speak. Instead she gazed at Zuko. She could make out the dim lines of his face. But his eyes seemed to flow. Tiny golden discs, boring into her. Did he know what she was thinking? Would he even guess?

Master Pakku said a warrior’s body would give him away if he was not precise and disciplined. Zuko’s foot had given away his final move. Now Katara’s gaze gave her away, revealing exactly what she wanted. 


	9. Magnets (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Magnets _

It occurred to Zuko, and he peered down at Katara, only inches beneath him, that he hadn’t yielded. She had guessed Zuko’s moves correctly. He had been trying to use up her source of bending. He’d been trying to evaporate all the water in the cavern without her noticing, because he had told her how to rob a firebender of their element. Without meaning to, he had told her on the first day that a chilly firebender was no firebender at all. 

But Katara had realized what he was doing. And she hadn’t played his game. She had raised the bar. Bringing water through the walls was… creative, stupid, powerful… It had hurt her as much as it had hurt him. And now she was in his arms, underneath him, sharing his air.

The win was his, if he wanted to claim it. But if he had to make a list of all the things he wanted at that current moment, winning was vastly overshadowed. All he had to do was lean forward. All he had to do was give in to the magnetic force pulling them closer. 


	10. Rescue (Katara)

Katara

_ Rescue _

“Katara!” “Zuko!” A crashing of rock and sudden light accompanied the familiar voices. 

Katara and Zuko separated, pushing themselves as far apart as they could, as Aang and Iroh descended on them. One incredibly confusing event replaced another, and Katara was left reeling. Aang knelt by her side, asking a million questions.  _ Are you hurt? What did they do to you? How long have you been down here? Are you okay? Did they hurt you?!? _ Katara couldn’t answer, she was still focused on the cold where Zuko’s body had been moments before. 

“Hey,” Aang’s voice was softer. He placed a hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay. Everything’s okay now. We’re gonna get you out of here.” 

Right. Rescue. Getting out. It was the only thing Katara had thought about during her imprisonment. Yet no feeling of relief or gratitude washed over it. She felt detached. 

To her side, Iroh pulled Zuko to his feet and they stood off to the side, having a heated discussion in voices too soft for Katara to hear. Aang helped her to her feet. 

“Did he hurt you?” Aang’s voice was low but made of steel. 

Katara could only stare at him. Still confused. 

“I thought… I thought I saw you two fighting.” 

“Oh.” Katara shook her head to clear it. “No, it’s fine, Aang. We were sparring.” Aang’s eyes bugged out of his head. “I accidentally caused a river to flood down here. That’s all.” 

Aang certainly seemed confused, but he didn’t press her. “Okay. Well, it’s a good thing I guess, cuz that exploding river is what led us to you!” Aang filled her in on what had been happening above while she was below, and told her about their plan to escape. Katara nodded, only half paying attention. She was straining her ears to hear what Zuko and his uncle were saying. 

As she listened, she swept the ground, looking for her robe. She found Zuko’s robe first, which made her cheeks glow. Even in the dim light, she could see Aang’s eyes narrow. “We took them off to spar,” she explained. It was the truth, so why did she feel like she was lying? 

Once Katara had located and put her robe back on, they made their way to Zuko and Iroh. She wordlessly handed him back the wet fabric. Zuko took it and began drying it with a fireball hovering on his palm. 

“I can do yours too,” he said, looking at the ground. 

Instead Katara flicked her arms to the side and the water in the robe flew out. 

“Avatar Aang.” The old man bowed respectfully to Aang. “It was an honor to work with you, but it seems we must part ways. My nephew and I need to leave this city, and I’m sure you need to find your friends. Perhaps we will see you again.” 

Zuko said nothing, but when Katara finally found the courage to look at him, he was staring at her. She could see the fire reflected in his golden eyes. 


	11. Almost (Zuko & Katara)

Zuko

_ Almost: Part 1 _

Her blue eyes were pleading with him. But what could he give her? Everything had changed. Everything had reverted. The cavern was a different world, where Zuko and Karata could bridge the distance they had been born across. It was a box that, once opened, spoiled what was inside. His uncle and her friend showed them who they really were: Zuko, banished prince of the Fire Nation, and Katara, the last waterbender of the Southern Tribe. 

As long as Aang was with her, her loyalty would always be to the Avatar. 

Zuko turned away from the group angrily. He wanted to cry, he wanted to hit something, he wanted to incinerate the little kid who dared to be special. Who dared to be  _ good _ . What was an angry, confused, fugitive prince in comparison to the  _ Avatar _ ? Zuko thought he  _ deserved  _ Katara? It was enough to make him laugh. It was enough to make him sick. Katara had never felt anything for him, she would see that when she returned to her normal life. She had been tired and lonely and … she had kissed him. 

Almost.

“Is he okay?” he heard the young Avatar ask. Even that small kindness made the kid better than him.

“Zuko has gone through much transformation,” Iroh said. “It can be painful, but it is worth it.”

“Thank you for your help,” said the boy. 

“Be safe,” Iroh said. 

Then they were gone. Zuko didn’t watch Katara run away.

  
  


Katara

_ Almost: Part 2 _

Aang led the way into the darkness and Katara followed. “This is the way back to the Earth King’s palace. Toph and Sokka should have rescued the Earth King from the fake Kyoshi warriors by now. We’ll meet them and get Appa and leave.” 

At the far wall of the cavern, Aang paused to open the wall like a huge door. It led to another dark cavern that Aang threw himself down. Katara jogged behind him, glad for the cover of darkness. Silent tears flowed down her face. Her emotions all pounded into one another as she ran. They had kissed. 

Almost. 

Their lips had grazed each other. Katara could still feel the whisper of a sensation.  _ Stupid, stupid, stupid _ . Even an almost kiss was going to hurt her friends. Aang worst of all. They could never find out. And what was there to find out? The kiss hadn’t even happened. Just some intense eye contact. And leaning in. And closing eyes.  _ Stop, stop, stop! _ And still the tears kept coming. Was she crying because the kiss had almost happened? Were her hormones disappointed that it hadn’t?  _ Or,  _ a little voice inside dared to wonder, was she mourning that whatever had almost happened was unlikely to ever almost happen again. 


	12. Bound (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Bound _

“Why did you let them leave?!” Zuko demanded as Aang and Katara disappeared into the darkness. 

“You didn’t stop them,” Iroh observed. His voice was maddeningly calm. Zuko hated that he could be so centered when the world was constantly fracturing. 

“You told me not to.” 

“Perhaps,” Uncle Iroh allowed. “But I think the time that I could tell you what to do has passed.” 

Zuko stomped his foot. He could think of a million reasons to go after the Avatar. His honor, his place within his family, his duty to his country. He could even see how, when they captured the pair, Katara could escape somehow. The Avatar was the priority. Some waterbender, though she would eventually need to be eliminated in his father’s perfect world, could disappear for a while. She’d never forgive him, of course. He’d never forgive himself either. 

“Let’s go, Zuko.” 

When he had first been banished, Uncle continued to use his title -- “Prince Zuko.” When had he stopped? A long time ago. It left a bitter taste in his mouth that he hadn’t noticed before. Uncle Iroh had never expected him to regain his title and birthright. Iroh knew it was impossible. Iroh knew his quest was doomed. Iroh knew he was no longer a prince. 

They said little as they plodded up the steep tunnel. Only the sound of their breath echoed off the dark stone tunnel. Iroh lit their way with a small fireball. It flickered and created shadows and barely let off enough light for Zuko to avoid tripping on the uneven surface. 

When the cavern filled with light, it came as a shock. A terrible grating sound accompanied giant crystals pushing through the walls. Suddenly they were not alone, but facing a legion of Dai Li agents. At the head of their party stood Azula.

For an infinite moment, they stood still, both in each other’s path. Then Azula clicked her fingers and crystals formed around Zuko and Iroh. 

Azula sighed like a parent who wasn’t mad, just disappointed. “I expected this kind of treachery from uncle, but never you.” 

“You’re the one who locked me down here!” Zuko twisted, but the crystal was immovable. 

“And that gives you permission to betray your country?” she shot back. Behind her the Dai Li stood like statues, a silent show of force. “Perhaps you thought, I already attacked the crown princess of the Fire Nation, why not go even further? Why not let Uncle free the Avatar?” 

Zuko’s mind reeled as he tried to stay calm. She had been watching. One of the most intimate and personal moments of his life, and Azula knew about it all. Had she been there herself? Waiting in the shadows? Watching the darkness and isolation tear at him? Zuko’s stomach twisted uncomfortably knowing that Azula could have been so close to Katara. 

“I’m disappointed, Zuko. Truly disappointed. I thought -- I don’t know what I thought. That I would be able to have my brother back some day? After everything you’ve done, I just don’t see how that will ever be more than a fantasy.” 

“Your fantasy is based on an incorrect understanding of your brother.” Iroh was still calm. Encased in crystal, at the mercy of Azula, and he still spoke like a fortune cookie!

Azula rolled her eyes. “Perhaps, uncle. Or, my fantasy was ruined -- my brother was corrupted by a treasonous voice in his head.” She sighed. “So sad, a thirteen year old boy separated from his home and family, with only one person to trust. And it was  _ you _ .” Disgust curled Azula’s lip. 

“I wish we could have taken you as well, niece,” Iroh responded sadly. 

Azula’s nostrils flared. “You wouldn’t have been able to turn me. If Zuko and I had stayed together -- no one would have been able to twist either of us!” 

“I didn’t twist Zuko. He found his own path on his own.” 

“Stop!” Zuko yelled. They were just going to argue about him like he wasn’t there? Like he had never made his own choices? Azula might think she was independent, but she was a pawn of their father’s. Zuko had been his own commander for three years. And here, after what he had been through, he wasn’t going to let Azula or Iroh decide his fate. 

Azula turned to look at him. She raised a finger to the Dai Li and suddenly the crystals holding him in place retreated into the earth. He was free -- in a tunnel surrounded by enemies. Iroh said that Zuko couldn’t think through the consequences of his actions, that he was rash, that he was stupid. Azula expected him to lash out. He would prove them all wrong. 

Azula smiled. 

“When I thought about this day, this glorious day in Fire Nation history, I thought that we would be together. Side by side, brother and sister, finally taking the jewel of the Earth Kingdom for ourselves.” 

_ Lies _ . When had Azula ever included him in anything? Let alone her fantasies. 

“I know I’m not a perfect sister,” she reached out to touch his arm. He flinched. “But I am your sister. I wanted this for  _ us _ , for our family -- that includes you. Picture it, Zuko, the city will fall to us tonight. Even as we speak my Dai Li agents are taking the Earth King and his Council of Five into custody. But we could bring home even more. We could bring the Avatar back to the Fire Nation together. Imagine it, you could have everything you ever wanted. You would be redeemed.” Azula’s eyes seemed to glow as she spoke. She was so certain -- why couldn’t Zuko have ever had that? 

“What she offers is not the kind of redemption you seek.” 

“Oh silence, Uncle. Zuko, I have never wished you harm.”

Zuko snorted. 

“Oh, sure, I’ve used violence. But you will see that you are fine -- and you know, if I had wanted to hurt you, you would have been hurt.” 

Zuko squeezed his hands into fists at his sides. 

“You’re my brother,” she said. “I can’t let that bond get in the way of my duty to my country, but I don’t like what I’ve had to do. Come home, Zuko. Don’t choose to put us on opposite sides. Please.” Azula reached for his hand and squeezed. “I miss you,” she whispered. 

Then his hand was dropped and she was back to usual. In the blink of an eye all traces of vulnerability were gone and she was back in command. “Here’s what’s going to happen. I am tracking the Avatar. The rest of the Dai Li will escort Uncle to prison. You are a free man, Zuko. You can choose what happens here. If you are devoted to Uncle, I’ll let you go with him and you can surrender yourself into Fire Nation custody. If you would rather gain back your honor and your home, you can come with me. The choice is yours.” 

Without looking back, Azula and the majority of the Dai Li marched down the tunnel, following the direction that Aang and Katara had gone. They had a significant lead on her, and Aang was the Avatar. Maybe they would escape after all. Zuko knew it wasn’t likely. 

He looked into his uncle’s eyes. Iroh said nothing. He didn’t need to. There was nothing in those pale irises except trust. Trust in Zuko. The gaze shattered him into a thousand pieces and revealed what was deep in his soul. 

Zuko squeezed his eyes shut and ran. 


	13. Outmatched (Katara)

Katara

_ Outmatched _

Katara’s battles were often panicked, abrupt, uncertain affairs. And though she felt all of those things and more, Zuko’s sister, Azula was a completely different enemy. It wasn’t even clear what Azula was trying to accomplish. She was a cat, playing with her prey. She enjoyed their struggle for freedom too much to decide whether to bring home her prize or have dinner.

Azula was easily the most deadly foe they had faced. With the aid of the Dai Li, the battle became increasingly futile. Katara could flood the cavern -- really flood it this time. It would mean instant death for their opponents. That’s what warriors did, right? They killed whoever tried to hurt them. It was what had always separated her friends from their enemies. They ran, escaped, and caused as little damage as possible. But eventually there would be no more running. Eventually they would have to take a stand. Eventually killing and death would decide the victors. For good. 

Was now eventually? Katara assumed that when the day came she would be older and more confident. She assumed that when the day came, it would be free of questions. But she had more doubts now than ever before. 

It didn’t help that she could see the family resemblance. The siblings were close in age, to the point that Katara couldn’t tell which was older. They had the same pale skin and inky black hair. But what was warm and conflicted about Zuko, was rendered cold and remorseless on his sister’s sharp features. Even Azula’s fighting showed her difference from her brother. Instead of strong offense, a firm stance, and a strategic battle plan, Azula would explode into a fury of attacks and then retreat abruptly. Every move was both spontaneous and perfectly placed. And when it suited her to rest, she didn’t look like a fighter at all. She was cool and collected, relaxed in her stance and demeanor. Above all, she had none of Zuko’s seriousness. Even now, with the Avatar in striking distance, the firebender emoted only amusement. 

Katara and Aang engaged with Azula, trying to double team her. But their combined strength seemed only to equal her at times, and never to outpace her. In the background, Katara was aware that they were hopelessly outmatched by Dai Li. They waited silently, in case Katara and Aang managed to get an edge on Azula. That wasn’t seeming very likely at all. 

Aang met Katara’s eyes across the cavern. Katara could see something in his eyes that sent a chill down her spine. He said something, but she was too far away to hear it. An apology? Then Aang sank to the ground and the crystals formed up around him, creating an impregnable cave. Katara’s heart sank, though she told it not to. Aang would never let her get hurt, whatever this was, it was … it was  _ something _ . 

A shrill laugh penetrated her thoughts. Katara turned to face Azula, who was leaning against the carved marble pool, examining her nails. 

“You can’t blame him,” Azula said. “He’s just a kid. He’s scared. He’ll regret abandoning you … later.”

Katara threw all of herself into her attack, but Azula bobbed and weaved and remained completely untouched. 

“I know it hurts now,” Azula called, as she landed a backflip. “If it’s any consolation, betrayal doesn’t hurt nearly as much as imprisonment in the Fire Nation. You could run. Without the Avatar, you’re nothing.” 

Katara answered with a wave, as if to show exactly what she was. 

Azula laughed. “Oh yes, a waterbender -- part of a dying breed, for sure. You’ll die, but you get to choose. Do you want it to be now, or later?” 

Katara threw attack after attack, but Azula dodged all. Then she saw the girl trace her fingers in a large circle. The air itself seemed to vibrate and Katara knew what was coming next. So this was it. The moment to decide. It hadn’t come for Katara when she was older and more sure. She was still plagued with doubts. But certainty wasn’t what the moment called for at all. There were only two options facing her as Azula gathered the electricity in the room: Katara had to kill or be killed. 

She closed her eyes and reached for the underground river. 

“No!” 

Sudden warmth filled the air. A giant fireball landed between her and Azula, forcing both of them backwards. The heat was terrible, but short. She and Azula both turned to see who dared interrupt their battle. Both smiled to see Zuko. 

It was him, in a sleeveless tunic, his hands flat and extended, his stance low. He didn’t smile back. His eyes flicked back and forth. Then his foot twitched. It was the slightest realignment, the slightest change in balance. But Katara had seen it before. 

_ Oh no. No, no, no! _

Katara didn’t wait for him to attack, didn’t wait for him to begin the end. Instead, she sent all that she had at him. For the first time since coming down below Ba Sing Se, she was ready to end Prince Zuko. She heard that chilling laugh somewhere behind her again, but she didn’t care. Zuko dodged and blocked her attacks. 

Before the siblings could combine their strength, Aang exploded. 

His crystal hut shattered, pieces flying everywhere. Aang himself rose into the air, eyes and tattoos glowing. Katara felt a sigh of relief. It was over. No one could stand against the knowledge and might of the Avatar’s collective memory. 

The entire room was too stunned to move. Zuko, the Dai Li, Katara turned to catch a glimpse of the Avatar’s righteous fury and administration of justice. It would end up being one of Katara’s greatest regrets. In the coming days, she would curse herself a thousand times over for turning her attention. There were only a handful of people in the world who wouldn’t be impressed by an Avatar in the Avatar State. One of them was in the caverns below Ba Sing Se. 

Aang was struck in the back. Lightning crackled around him. Some of the electricity escaped through his mouth as he gasped in shock. Then the light of the Avatar State drained away and Aang fell towards the earth. Katara screamed as she twisted, bringing the underground river over its banks. Dai Li, Zuko, Azula went tumbling, but the wave caught Aang as gently as a pillow. The currents pushed Katara to him, to cradle him in her arms. His skin was so cold… 

She turned to look at them; she had to see them. Azula’s smile and hungry eyes. They were responsible. The Dai Li getting to their feet. Whatever happened to the world next was their fault -- all of them! Zuko’s face was a mask of horror. 

Katara screamed again. Tears were falling again from her eyes. She soared over them on a wave that was still growing, Aang still clutched to her body. All of her combatants adopted a fighting stance, Zuko included. A small part of Katara’s brain wondered what would happen to her when she flooded the cavern. Would she drown? Could she drown? Only one way to find out. 

“Go!” 

For the second time, the battle was interrupted by a fireblast. This one far surpassed the first in terms of power. It wasn’t a blast. It was a wall of fire. She sank back to the ground. Azula, Zuko, and Dai Li were all separated from her for the moment. On this side of the wall, Iroh stood, struggling to hold it high. He glanced back at her. 

“Go,” he said again. His voice was ragged. 

“But…” Katara gestured wordlessly to Aang. 

“It’s not over.” Iroh’s voice was a whisper. She had to concentrate to hear his next words. “Your enemies only win when you admit defeat.” 

Katara locked her arms around Aang and threw them both into the river. She hastened the current and soon they were swallowed up by darkness again. 


	14. Credit (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Credit _

Zuko took nearly three weeks to work up the courage to face his sister. Okay, he borrowed courage from a sculpted silver goblet. But he was going to do it. He promised himself. They just had to suffer through this ridiculous banquet. It was nice at first. Zuko felt like he was being honored. Now, however, as he sat through the fifth celebration banquet since his return, none of which featured his father, the meals started to feel more like distractions. 

Zuko was also aware that he was not being celebrated as enthusiastically. Sure, the generals and important people in his father’s government said the right things at the right times. Many of them tried to flatter him and gain favor. The servants and commoners that he interacted with were appropriately subordinate and respectful. Yet, behind all of their eyes -- high and low alike -- there was a tension, a hollowness. Their words and actions rang of dissonance -- the Avatar was an enemy of the Fire Nation, the Avatar was a friend and protector of the world. 

Even seated next to Azula in twin seats of honor, there was never a moment where he could actually talk to her. She spoke to him, but it was her public voice, her loyal, sweet princess voice. The only indication she gave that she was aware of the storm brewing inside her brother was that she matched him, drink for drink. Whenever it seemed like the opportunity might arise for conversation, Zuko found himself bombarded by Azula’s friends from school. Tylee and … Min? Zuko was in the middle of a very confusing conversation with Tylee when he realized that Azula was nowhere to be seen. 

“So Sokka… he’s from the Southern Water Tribe, right? Do you think he might go back there now that the Avatar is dead?” she asked. 

Zuko stood. “I guess? Where is Azula?” 

“She went to bed,” said the other one. Ming? The aloof, unapproachable one. The tall, graceful, darkly beautiful knife-wielder.

“I have to go.” 

“Wait! Sokka said something about being  _ with _ a Kyoshi warrior. Do you know if that’s like… still a thing? Or has it kind of fizzled since we imprisoned all the Kyoshi warriors?” 

“He has no idea about the  _ splasher’s _ love life, Tylee.” Mai. Her name was Mai. Mai’s unsmiling, enigmatic persona was alluring. She was the polar opposite of…  _ someone he wasn’t going to think about _ \-- and much more suited for Zuko than …  _ that girl who doesn’t matter anymore! _ He was drawn to Mai, but not now. 

He had other business tonight.

Zuko pounded on Azula’s door until she answered. She was dressed in a bathrobe and pushed sleep from her eyes. 

“Zuko? To what do I owe the pleasure?” 

“Why did you lie?” he asked, storming past her into her room. 

She yawned and shut the door. “I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific.” 

“You killed the Avatar,” Zuko accused. The alcohol thrummed in his bloodstream.

She smiled and glanced to the side. “Did I? Hmm, what a victory. Thank you, Azula.” 

“Why did you tell them I did it? You didn’t give yourself any credit which is very unlike you.” 

Now Azula looked cross. “Don’t tell me about myself. You don’t know what is or isn’t like me. You’ve been gone for four years, or had you forgotten?” 

“I remember everything.” 

“Okay.” Her voice was light and conversational again. “Let’s test that perfect memory. Do you remember when you were banished?” 

“Vividly.” 

“And what did Father say to you when he sent you into exile? What conditions did he set up for your return?” 

Zuko found he couldn’t look at her anymore. Instead he addressed the Fire Nation emblem emblazoned on the wall. “He said I had to restore my honor.” 

“Yes. Your honor. And so you set off on your…  _ quest _ . The Avatar had been lost for a hundred years, but  _ you _ were going to find him. At the time it was ridiculous, but in hindsight… visionary. Of course, you could have done any number of things to get Father’s approval. You could have killed that ridiculous Earth Kingdom lord, Bumi? I think. You could have launched an attack on the Northern Water Tribe, or even just found where they were hiding. Father didn’t care what you did. He wanted his son back, but he knew that you had to redeem yourself or you would never be respected in the Fire Nation again.” 

Zuko seethed.

“You didn’t need to stay away all this time,” Azula continued. “I  _ told _ you that you could have come back. A year -- at most! Father wanted you home. But you’re both so stubborn…” Azula seemed genuinely rattled. She was never rattled, she was never anything but cool and in control. 

It had been Uncle who said that there was something in Azula that was without reason. Iroh he saw too much of his brother, their father and their grandfather in her. She had a lack of empathy that made Iroh fear for her future. And then their mother… while her love for Zuko was obvious and unconditional, it was clear, even as young children, that the feeling for Azula was much more complicated. 

Zuko viewed his sister as holding an inhuman quality. Something that insulated her from pain and sorrow. But here she was in front of him. She was feeling… something. Was this what Azula looked like when she was… being human?

“So,” Azula’s calm voice was back -- like an ill-fitting mask. “Remind me, Zuko. What heroic act did you commit during the Battle of Ba Sing Se? Was it… when you attacked me in the palace? Or was it when you got yourself thrown in prison for a few days? No, it must have been when I captured our traitorous uncle and you cried, wasting time, letting the Avatar evade you again.” Her lip curled in disgust. “I even  _ gave _ the last waterbender from the South Pole, just you and her in the caves under the city. But you didn’t do  _ anything _ . So I had to. Like always.”

Zuko felt like the air inside his lungs was contracting, pulling his whole body tighter. She  _ gave _ him Katara? She had orchestrated the whole thing so that he could kill one fourteen year old girl? That would have constituted honor? That would have reclaimed for him his spot at home? Zuko held himself still as he felt the banquet food rising in his esophagus.  _ It doesn’t matter. You  _ should _ have killed her. She doesn’t matter. _ He clenched his shaking hands into fists. Azula didn’t notice. She wasn’t focused on anything but herself. She paced back and forth, hands gesturing wildly. 

“ _ I _ killed the Avatar and gave you credit.  _ I  _ restored your honor.  _ I _ brought you home. Because you’re right, Zuko, I’m not selfless. I do things because I want to do them. It was time for you to come home. That’s what I wanted.” 

Azula sat in the chair, one leg tucked under herself. She was a picture of poise, completely unperturbed. But the arms and hands that gripped the chair were taut as bowstrings. She was waiting, as still as a hunter ready to spring. 

Zuko thought of a million things to say. He could tell her what he actually thought of her. What would she do then? Laugh at him most likely, and spend the rest of the night plotting revenge. He could accept what she said, even if he didn’t truly mean it. But she was like a bloodhound when it came to lying and Zuko didn’t think he could fool her. 

Instead he sat on the ground and played with a loose thread in the carpet. “When I was banished,” he told the thread, “I never considered how our family was broken for you too. I just always thought ‘Azula got to stay. She must be happy.’ It’s hard for me to overcome years of thinking like that.” 

“Hmph.” 

When he looked at her she was staring at the window, glaring, like he did when he was trying to hold back tears. Was it possible that everything she had said was true? Had she really missed him? Was killing the Avatar and giving Zuko the credit her twisted way of showing that she loved him? 

Zuko didn’t know if he could handle being loved like that.

“Did you talk to Uncle on the way home?” The question spilled out of Zuko’s mind. A nagging idea had been pulling at his brain since the Avatar had died. 

Mention of Uncle brought Azula back to her usual self. She relaxed, even stretching her arms above her head and yawning. “I spoke to him. He didn’t speak back.” She shrugged. “Why? Did he say something to you?” 

“No.” Zuko’s attention returned to the thread. “I couldn’t face him.” 

“It’s for the best,” Azula said. She awkwardly patted his head. “Uncle led you astray. Now you’re back with me, and Father. You’re back in your rightful place as prince. It’s where you should be.” 

Zuko didn’t know if he believed in even the small sliver of destiny that Azula suggested. Fate had only ever played cruel tricks on him. He didn’t feel like honoring it by believing that there was any sort of plan for him. 

“Did you see Katara? She took the Avatar’s body.” 

“Who’s Katara? The waterbender? So what? She was… in grief.”

“What if she wasn’t?” Zuko asked. “What if… what if the Avatar didn’t die? And what if Uncle knew that and that’s why he let them escape? Katara can heal people, you know.” 

“She might be able to mend scrapes and bruises. But there’s no healer in the world that can undo the damage the Avatar took. Does he even have a body to heal anymore? Or does it dissolve into the cosmic balance blah blah blah. I can never remember.” 

Zuko stood. Was it possible that Azula didn’t know? Of course it was possible. Azula had mercilessly bullied all of their tutors when they were young. She was only interested in history as it applied to her, everything else was beneath her. Lessons of spirituality and the Avatar’s place among man -- that would have bored her to tears. 

“Azula… the Avatar, if he’s killed in the Avatar State -- the glowing eyes and floating and unimaginable power -- then he doesn’t come back. If the Avatar is dead, he’s gone forever.” 

Azula smiled. A true and untroubled smile. “Perfect!”

“But what if he’s not dead!?” Zuko knew he sounded like a nervous wreck. His voice cracked. His hands trembled. As his anxiety reached its zenith, Azula’s faded to non-existence. Her brief fling with vulnerability was over.

“If that were the case, it would be a real problem for whoever claimed to have killed him.” 


	15. Spirits Don't Cry (Katara)

Katara

_ Spirits Don’t Cry _

Katara knew this couldn’t last.  _ They were on a tight schedule. _ Even in Katara’s mind her brother’s voice was annoying. But she had found something in this small village that had been missing since… Ba Sing Se. Katara knew she was beginning to edge towards the cliff in her memories. At the bottom was heartbreak and betrayal. Instead of allowing her brain to explore the harsh geography she had created there, she jumped off a real cliff. 

Hitting the water didn’t hurt anymore. It was like being a little kid, caught in her father’s safe and secure arms. The water propelled her towards the town with barely even a thought. It insulated her from the murk of the pollution. In the water Katara was safe. 

But she had to emerge. There was medicine to deliver. Her water deposited her gently on the dock. She glanced at her reflection to make sure that her make-up was undisturbed. She pulled the brim of her large hat farther down her face and pulled mist out of the river to further shroud her. 

Once completely ensconced, the Painted Lady made her way to the infirmary. There she left the vials of medicine taken from the factory. It was a cruel twist of fate that tonight, on their first night without the medicine, would be the first night the Fire Nation soldiers would need it. An image of their bodies, broken and twisted in odd, stomach-churning ways flashed in her mind. 

Katara pushed the empathetic thought away with troubling ease. 

She busied herself with the sick. One by one she crept through the quiet infirmary, healing as she went. Occasionally one of her patients would wake up. But when they did, they saw the face of their patron spirit. Some thanked her. Some simply fell back to sleep with a happy smile. None were scared. None worried about the actions the Painted Lady would take to protect them.

There were a number of reasons that Katara had kept her nighttime administrations to herself, but none of them were very good. Sure, Sokka would be angry about messing up their timeline. And Toph had been bored in this little Fire Nation town. Aang wouldn’t approve of her methods -- but he would probably still want to help her help others. 

Mystery and solitude were crucial components of the Painted Lady costume, and Katara found that she wore them comfortably. It was nice to escape herself every night. It was a pleasure to become something else -- something more. Because Katara wasn’t powerful. Katara couldn’t protect the people that she loved -- Katara could only stitch them back together when they were broken. The Painted Lady, however, could protect an entire village. The Painted Lady never awoke in the middle of the night with the feeling of fire on her lips quickly fading. The Painted Lady never let her best friend be killed. The Painted Lady didn’t break hearts, not anyone’s, not even her own. She was an immortal spirit, unplagued by anxiety and woe. 


	16. Jealous (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Jealous _

“A freak? That’s fine! At least I have my own identity. Instead of being part of a matched set.” 

“I am the perfect daughter. As long as I don’t move or speak or breathe out of turn.” 

“My own mother thought I was a monster. I mean, she was right of course.” 

“Who are you angry at, Zuko?” 

“Tell us, Zuko.” 

“Mother?” 

“Your father?” 

“Your uncle?” 

“Me?” 

“I’m angry at myself!” 

Zuko shouldn’t have said that. Not in front of Azula. She had remained true to her word, that she had only wanted her brother back. Still, in order to gain what she had wanted, she was willing to sacrifice the world’s last chance for balance. Not willing… eager. Even if Azula loved him like she said she did, it wasn’t safe to tell her too much. Who knows what she might do with that information? To protect him from himself? 

He shuddered to imagine it. 

And then there was Mai. What a twisted situation that was. He didn’t even like her! Or… he did. He knew that in a previous life, one where he had never left the Fire Nation, she would have been his dream girl. He did like her.  _ Loved  _ her. He had to love her. When that guy at the party had been talking to her, he had felt  _ something _ . Jealousy. He was jealous that some random guy was hitting on his girlfriend. Obviously.

Although, he could have been jealous of someone else entirely.

“What a revealing night this has been,” Azula quipped. 

“I know what will make us feel better,” Zuko said. 

They had returned to the party; destroyed the place. They were good at it. They worked as a team. Tylee swung through the rafters, pulling down lights and tapestries. Anything that Zuko didn’t char to a crisp, Mai shredded. Azula didn’t care as much about the things and the house, she zeroed in on one poor sucker, taunting and trapping him. In the end, he looked like his own heart might give up on him.

Later, as they slept in their own bedrooms in Li and Lo’s beach house, Zuko stared at the dark ceiling. He was on the verge of sleep -- it had been an exhausting day of beach fun. In the halfspace between wakefulness and slumber Zuko allowed his mind to wander. It was the only time he wondered what could have been. 

It was the only time he thought of Katara. 

When he pictured her, she was always framed in the darkness of their shared prison. It made him sad that he would never see her in kinder circumstances. They would never have a beach day together. The Zuko and Katara that had formed a brief “they” existed only as part of a larger trap. She had only been put down there to be easy prey… for him. Knowing that Azula had meant for him to kill her tainted all the memories he had of her. 

Sleep pulled at his mind. Katara stood in front of him; she smiled. She was dressed as she had been for their sparring match. That was when she had been the most free -- taunting him, flirting with him. Her exposed skin was brown and warm and soft. She reached for him, held his face in her hands. Then, she began to change, her features melting away. Her body split in half, still holding on to him. They fell, pulled down by a relentless current. When they landed, Katara had doubled and morphed. Now the hand that held onto his left side belonged to Mai, full of melancholy and misanthropy. The other hand that gripped the right side of his face was the hand of his sister. Azula grinned at him, the shadows on her face growing more and more severe until she wore a mask of amusement and hatred. Vainly, Zuko tried to twist out of their grasp. The harder he pulled, the tighter their grips became until he felt they would rip his face off entirely. 


	17. Goodbye (Katara)

Katara

_ Goodbye _

The day of Black Sun was upon them. Today they would launch a full scale attack on the Fire Lord’s palace. Today they would bring the Fire Lord to justice. Today they would face him… and his family. Sokka’s plan didn’t say much about the Fire Lord’s children. They were, like all firebenders during the eclipse, reduced to ordinary soldiers, and Sokka planned to be in and out before their horrific abilities were brought back. Today, Azula and Zuko were not important.

Katara and Toph had been furious when they had learned they wouldn’t be at the front of the attack. Katara knew she had every right to be with them as they ended the journey that she had started. But battle-master Sokka was firm that she and Toph had to be with the watertanks and ground forces. Katara backed off easier than Toph. She convinced herself that she didn’t care; she convinced herself that it was a  _ good _ thing. She and Toph were being trusted with the defense of their whole little army. It was an honor. Sokka was a good strategist. However she could be helpful, that was what she wanted to do. 

Katara knew that none of those explanations were the reason why her heart swayed with relief when Sokka first told her. Katara knew the real reason was that she was scared to face the Fire Prince again. Not scared of him. Katara was scared of herself and what she would do or not do when she saw him again. Would she be reduced to that crying mess again, incapable of acting? Or would she be so filled with rage and hurt that she would kill him? Katara knew she couldn’t live with either; it was a good thing she would stay behind. 

Just beyond the gates of Azulon, the party paused to relay last minute messages and make sure the battle plans were clear. Katara took a moment to climb to the top of her tank and grab some fresh air while she had the chance. The next few hours promised to be cramped, chaotic, and confused. Right now, however, the sky was a blissful, cloudless expanse. The sea that she had always loved rose and fell around her, like a mother rocking her children. The reflection of the sun refracted a thousand times over the uneven surface, combining with the motion of the waves to make the sea truly come to life. Like it was smiling at her. 

A small thud on the deck announced Aang’s arrival. He had shaved his head and donned traditional air monk robes. He looked like the little kid she had found in the ice all those months ago. A little taller, a little more serious, but he looked like Aang. Katara’s heart swelled with love and worry. 

“I just needed to say goodbye before…” Aang’s voice was rough and uneven. 

Katara crossed the distance between them and took Aang’s hand. Despite the knots in her stomach, Katara forced a bright, confident face to the surface. It was what Aang needed. Whatever Aang needed, that’s what she had to do. The world needed Aang to do the impossible today. The world needed Aang to believe that he could.

“Aang. We’ll see each other again.” She sounded confident, even to herself. Why shouldn’t she be? Aang was the Avatar. He had always done what he needed to before. This was his destiny. Katara had been the first one to believe that he could do it. As much as she had changed since that day, this hadn’t. 

“Just in case,” Aang said shyly. 

Katara was confused -- but only for a millisecond. Then the boy in the ice put a hand to her cheek and reached up to kiss her. Of all the things Katara had mentally prepared for today, this was not one of them. Though, in retrospect, that was stupid. She wasn’t that blind. 

When Aang kissed her, she gave it her best shot. She really did. She kissed him back and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. She’d been dreaming of kissing for months now, why not enjoy it when it happened? Yet, when she closed her eyes, the world didn’t go completely dark. It was lit with a dim green glow. When she and Aang broke apart, she nearly expected the eyes looking at her to be gold. 

But they were gray. And full of glee and renewed confidence. In a swift movement he opened his glider and flew off into the sky. Katara watched him go, hoping that was what he needed to get through the day and come back to see her again. There were dozens of possible outcomes of the invasion. In all likelihood, Katara would never see one pair of eyes again -- gray or gold -- and Katara knew which side she was on. 


	18. Farewell (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Farewell _

“Writing a love letter?” 

Azula leaned casually against the doorframe. Zuko’s heart beat in his whole body. 

“Mai is with her uncle at the Boiling Rock,” Zuko said, getting up slowly and joining his sister. She was dressed in the armor and colors of the Fire Nation army, but she didn’t appear like someone heading out to war. She was completely relaxed, a teenage girl here to gossip. 

“I’m not talking about Mai,” Azula said slowly. She giggled. Zuko’s stomach clenched. 

Zuko knew Azula knew about Katara. She had hinted it. Zuko had seen for himself how skilled the Dai Li were at hanging in the darkness of the tall caverns. But since that day, she had never said a word. Until now, the day that Katara and the rest of the Avatar’s forces were launching an invasion on their palace. 

What did Azula want? 

“Let me refresh your memory,” Azula said, really enjoying herself. “You were trapped underground, you didn’t know when -- or if -- I would ever let you out. You were so  _ scared  _ and alone! But you weren’t alone, there was someone there to comfort you in your darkest hour.” 

He swung his body around in a giant, theatrical kick, aiming his heel for her chest. She saw it coming from a mile away and nimbly jumped back into the hallway. He followed, throwing forceful punches of flame that she twisted and avoided, never breaking a sweat, never losing her smile. At the end of the hallway, she leaned against a window. 

“Did I strike a nerve?” 

“Are you going to tell Mai?” he demanded. 

“I really should,” said Azula. “Mai is a dear friend. I shouldn’t let her be lied to.” 

Zuko put up his fists as a threat. “If the Dai Li were watching then they know nothing happened.” 

Azula smiled -- but something had changed. Her smile was off. Her eyes were dark. “I wouldn’t worry about Mai, though she will probably put a few throwing stars in your eye if she ever finds out. That’s nothing -- compared to what Father will do.” 

Zuko had seen his father exactly once since returning to the Fire Nation. They had been at a war meeting together. His father had spoken to him, looked at him, even congratulated him. And unlike some of the others, Zuko could tell his father was being genuine when he praised Zuko for killing the Avatar. 

Zuko’s stomach twisted. Was the Avatar still alive? Was he coming to the palace today? Something in him made him think that the Avatar was still out there. Today his father would think he was a liar, on top of a traitor and a coward. He could blame Azula, tell the truth about what had happened, but that had never gone well before. 

Zuko threw fire and got up close to her. His hand was inches from her face. “You can’t tell him.” 

Azula shrugged. “I don’t know what to do. I’m conflicted. Should I protect my brother? Even if it means putting my father in danger? Or should I tell him, warn him -- even though it means I’ll never see you again.” 

“Warn him? About a fifteen year old girl? I don’t think Father will be scared of her.”  _ Though he should be. _

Azula smiled. She had caught her prize. “And he shouldn’t be. But you forget Zuko, your place in all of this. That pretty little girl only  _ thinks _ she’s coming for father. But when she breaches the Fire Lord’s chamber, it’s going to be you, instead.” 

Zuko could have laughed, but it wasn’t the time. There was something off about Azula. He couldn’t put his finger on it. Laughing at her would only add air to her flames -- or gunpowder to her volcano. 

“You’re the Fire Lord’s  _ decoy _ , Zuko. You’re there to trap the Avatar’s little friends. Will you be able to do it?” 

“There’s nothing to do,” Zuko pointed out. “I won’t have my firebending, no one will.” 

Azula rolled her eyes. 

“Don’t be so coy. We all know about your swords.” 

Zuko swallowed his nerves. Yes, the swords were his advantage during the eight minutes that he and all other firebenders were rendered useless. He was counting on that. 

“So what?” 

“I assume you’ll be armed, ready to do anything to keep the children busy until the eclipse ends.” 

“Sure.” 

“You know what really takes up time? What really distracts from your goals?” 

“Being dead?” Zuko guessed. 

“You  _ are  _ my brother.” 

“I will do whatever it takes.” Zuko wished his voice wasn’t shaking. 

“Hmm. I don’t think you will.  _ That’s  _ why I have to tell Father.” 

She began to walk down the hall. “Wait! What do you want, Azula?” Zuko wanted to be done with her games. 

She turned to glare at him. “That’s why you’ve always been a failure. You always think in terms of what  _ you _ want, what  _ I _ want, what everyone  _ wants! _ But you’re the Fire Lord’s son! You’re the stand-in for Father today. It isn’t about what  _ you _ want. It’s about what’s good for our people. Those are the decisions that you should be making.” 

Zuko doubted very much that Azula made every -- or any -- decision based on the needs of her people. In her words, he saw what she wanted, what she had always wanted. She wanted the throne, she wanted to be the crown prince. And why shouldn’t she have it? She was a prodigious firebender, the likes of which hadn’t been seen in centuries. Plus, she had their father’s disposition. She was Ozai’s heir. 

The line of succession had been blurred by Zuko’s banishment; no one had bothered to straighten it out since his return. Ozai probably wanted this, his children fighting to be first in line. Whoever was stronger, faster, and more vicious would get the throne. That was the one that deserved to rule. Zuko knew he should just let her have it. It meant nothing to him. 

But. She was his  _ sister _ . He should at least try. 

“It’s just a decoy, Azula,” he said softly. “Just a military maneuver. It doesn’t mean anything.” 

“Of course it does,” she snapped. “The best firebender should be protecting Father. And that’s me. I killed the Avatar -- you let him escape. That’s what I should really tell Father. You’re nothing but a traitor and you always have been. That’s why you let some pathetic, waterbending  _ slut _ get to you. You’re weak.” 

Azula didn’t think of Zuko as her family. She didn’t see anyone that way. She viewed them all as allies and advantages. Or as enemies and weaknesses. There was no in between for Azula. Zuko believed that when it had suited her, she had truly wanted her brother back. Now that he was in her way, she wanted her brother gone. It was that simple. 

Zuko saw her so clearly now. All this time he thought she was a supernatural judge of character, and a master of manipulation. But standing in front of him now was a bare nerve. Azula was a dangerous cocktail of ambition and cruelty, to be sure. However, now that he saw her for what she was, she was entirely predictable. She thought he was an emotional loser? Might as well give her what she came for. 

“What do you want, Azula? Just come out with it. Do you want to be the decoy? Fine. I hope you’re ready to go to a fight completely unarmed, defenseless. I’ll tell you this -- that girl is going to be throwing around a lot more than her looks. Are you really so arrogant to think that you can stand against a waterbending master without your bending!?”

Azula smirked. She smelled victory. 

“I should tell Mai that she has to up her game. One kiss from a splasher and you’re all turned around. But don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. You can play around with whoever you want. I don’t care. Just remember who your family is. I’ll tell Father that you would rather not be the decoy, sound good?” 

Zuko glared at her until she was gone. Then he returned to his room and slowly shut the door. He finished his letter with trembling hands. The whole time Azula had been taunting him, implying that he was a traitor, the evidence was out on his desk for anyone to see. It wasn’t a love letter, not to Mai at least. It was an explanation, an excuse, a declaration of intent. It was a farewell. 

Zuko had much to leave in the Fire Nation. But Mai was the only one who might be interested in reading what he had to say. 

  
  
  



	19. Trust (Katara)

Katara felt so full of rage and betrayal that she thought she might be able to firebend. She reached out, felt the power of flames filling her veins and struck at the tapestry hanging in her room in the Western Air Temple. Of course, no fire came out. Instead the water in the air condensed, the tea next to her bed went flying. She reclaimed the water soaking into the tapestry and struck again, and again, and again. The tapestry fell before her wordless fury and still she didn’t stop. Only when it was in sodden shreds on the ground did she pause, putting her hands on her knees, sucking in deep, trembling breaths. 

“I think it’s dead.” 

Katara whirled to see Sokka standing at the door. 

“Can I come in?” 

Katara thought about refusing. She was in no mood for a lecture. She was in no mood for Sokka to impersonate the father they had just lost… again. But her brother rarely requested things from her, so she nodded. Sokka came in and sat down on her windowsill. Katara stood at an angle to him, not facing him, not ignoring him, waiting. But he didn’t launch a pre-rehearsed speech. Sokka just waited. 

“I don’t know what you want from me,” Katara said when she couldn’t stand the silence anymore. 

“Just wanted to see if you were okay.” 

Katara laughed joylessly. “Okay? Well, I’m not. And none of you should be either.” 

“Yeah, I’m not crazy about Zuko either--” 

“Crazy about him? You should be angry, you should be afraid!” 

“Aang trusts him and Toph says he isn’t lying,” Sokka pointed out. 

“They’re thirteen!” 

“That’s not fair, Aang and Toph have seen just as much of the world and people as we have.” 

“That’s where you’re wrong.” Katara turned away from her brother. “You all _didn’t_ see what Zuko is really capable of. I was the one who was trapped with him below Ba Sing Se. I was the one who saw how he can twist his words and manipulate people and betray them. It’s not Aang or Toph you should have asked, it was me!” 

Katara hated the tears that sprang to her eyes. She could feel that Sokka had moved from the windowsill to her side, but he knew her well enough not to touch her. 

“I trust you Katara. More than anyone else in the world.” Sokka’s voice was low too. 

“Then why--” 

Sokka held up a hand. “Which is it? Did he manipulate you in Ba Sing Se, or did he betray you?” 

“What?” 

“They’re different. Either he was planning to hurt you from the beginning, or he changed his mind along the way. For me, I’d rather he changed his mind because, well, maybe it was a mistake. We can deal with mistakes -- with people who make mistakes. We’ve all made mistakes.” Katara heard the failure of the invasion weighing on her brother’s words. “What I don’t want is someone who has never questioned the actions of the Fire Nation. I don’t want someone who lied to my sister in order to hurt her. So… did he lie? Or did he change his mind?” 

“It doesn’t matter. If he lied, then he’s a liar. If he changed his mind, then he could do it again!” 

Sokka nodded. “Still… I’d like to know which it was.” 

Katara had never considered the events below Ba Sing Se in the way that Sokka was suggesting. To answer him would mean a deep consideration of her memories. It would mean looking at those events that she and Zuko had shared through a new lens, unclouded by anger, and fear, and resentment. She didn’t know if she could do it. 

“I don’t know, Sokka,” she whispered. 

“Take all the time you need to think about it. When you know, I’ll listen to you. I promise. And if you say we have to throw him out, then I’ll make sure it happens.” Sokka opened his arms towards her and Katara folded herself into her hug. Maybe Sokka wasn’t always impersonating Dad, maybe he had really learned from him. 

Sokka left Katara alone to think, and she went for a long walk along the cliffs. When she finally returned to the temple, it had been dark for a long time. Haru and The Duke were still at the fire, but otherwise it was quiet. Everyone else had retreated to their rooms. Katara went into the temple, searching for him. It took a while to find his room in the corner of an empty floor, far away from the others.

Zuko had left his door open, and light streamed out into the hallway. Katara could see him through the doorway as he set up his stuff. She saw him take a long look at a portrait of his uncle -- the man that had made it possible for Katara to escape Ba Sing Se with Aang. The man who made it possible for Katara to bring Aang back. The man who had saved the Avatar. What was Zuko thinking as he looked at that portrait? Was he making his uncle proud? Or was he planning to disappoint him again?

Zuko jumped when he finally saw Katara. 

“Hey!” he said. His voice cracked. 

She slowly entered his room, arms crossed, head bowed. When she spoke her voice was soft, and sharp. “You may have everyone else here buying your _transformation_ , but you and I both know that you’ve struggled with doing the right thing in the past.”

Zuko stepped back from her. “I know I--” 

Katara held up a hand, silencing him. “So let me be clear. If you take one step backwards, one slip up -- if you give me one reason to think you might hurt Aang, then you won’t have to worry about your destiny anymore.” 

She made herself look into his eyes. Blue met gold. She wanted him to see that she was serious. He bit his lip and stared at the ground. He was freaked. _Good_. Before she could sweep out of the room dramatically, his body language changed. He stood up straight and, looking at her eyes, gold to blue, he bowed as a student would bow to their master. 

When Zuko straightened up, Katara was gone. 


	20. Betrayal (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Betrayal _

“You wrote me a note?” 

Mai shook the letter he had written in front of his face. This was less than ideal. They were in the Fire Nation’s most secure prison trying to free a prisoner that wasn’t even there -- and Zuko’s ex-girlfriend was going to be their biggest problem? Now  _ that’s _ rough. 

“I’m sorry,” Zuko told the ground for the thousandth time. 

“Tell me why,” Mai demanded. 

“It was the right thing to do.” 

“No.” Mai’s voice trembled. Was she crying? She hated crying. Zuko peeked up at her. “How could this be the right thing to do? You betrayed your family! You betrayed your country. You betrayed me. Everyone who has ever loved you is going to suffer if the Avatar succeeds. You know what the Avatar is going to do to your  _ father _ if he wins! How could you do this? Tell me!”

Mai’s words hit him like knives. He actually would have preferred that she use her knives. You try to avoid them until one hits you and you die. Easy. There was no way to dodge the truth in Mai’s words. It had already struck him a thousand times over. 

“I know.” Zuko forced the words out through gritted teeth. “It’s terrible what I’ve done. I’ve betrayed everyone by leaving. But if I had stayed--” Zuko trailed off. He couldn’t finish the sentence. 

“If you stayed?” Mai demanded. “What would have been so terrible if you stayed. You would have been the Prince of the Fire Nation. You would have been Fire Lord one day. You could have been with me!”

Zuko knew what he had to say. The words rang in his head. It was the only thing to say -- no more hiding behind his uncle or his honor. But when he finally forced the words out, it would break Mai’s heart in two. When Azula heard, she would harden her heart to him forever, if she hadn’t already. When his father heard, there would be no chance for forgiveness. Just one sentence would seal his fate forever. 

“If I had stayed,” Zuko forced himself to look into her eyes, so that she would know he meant what he said. “I would have been betraying myself.” 

He watched Mai retreat inside herself. It broke him up to see her go back to that secret place inside. She nodded and shrugged and left Zuko alone in his cell. Zuko didn’t see her again until she arrived while his sister was trying to kill him. It made him sad, but it wasn’t entirely unexpected. Now Avatar’s gang could add jealous ex-girlfriend to the list of people who were determined to kill them. 

The scene was confusing to watch. The gondola was shaking like crazy and moving farther and farther away each second. But something was not right on the platform. Zuko’s first clue was Azula’s body language. It was like she was a cat, with hackles that rose in fury. Zuko nearly hung out the back, trying to see what was going on. It wasn’t until Tylee disabled his sister and Azula dropped to the ground that Zuko accepted what his eyes had told him. 

Mai had betrayed Azula. She had convinced Tylee to do the same. But they were surrounded by guards, there was no way for them to escape. Mai had given up her freedom, to save his. 

“We have to go back!” Zuko said to Sokka. 

“We can’t!” Sokka screamed back. “There is no way back!” 

Zuko pounded on the metal box with his fist. He knew Sokka was right. He knew Mai wasn’t stupid -- she had made her choice and known the consequences. But it was all so unfair. When Sokka and Katara and Toph and Aang wanted to do something heroic, it was heroic. No questions asked. When he -- or anyone from the Fire Nation -- tried to do the right thing it meant hurting your friends and family. Doing the right thing meant betraying everything you had ever known. 


	21. Worst Parts (Zuko)

Zuko

_ Worst Parts _

This was … awkward. Flying through the air on the back of an air bison should be the most freeing feeling in the world. But even above the clouds, Zuko felt incredibly trapped by Katara’s obvious hatred of him. She sat on Appa’s head, holding the reins, never once turning to look at him in the saddle. At first Zuko had been excited that she had let him come on this trip, he thought it meant things between them were healing. But the longer she ignored him, the more worried Zuko became. If she still mistrusted him this much, then Katara was beyond caring what happened to herself. 

When the sun began to set, he scooched to the front of the saddle. “Katara?” She gave no indication that she heard him. “Hey, we should land, make camp for the night.” Nothing. “You should be rested when we meet up with the Southern Raiders.” 

She turned her chin. “Don’t worry about my strength.” 

Zuko recognized that hard flint in her voice. It was something he had felt, for many years, while hunting the Avatar. It made Zuko sad. But he crawled away from her and did his best to sleep in the air. 

They made a good team. Even Katara wouldn’t be able to deny that. Their infiltration of the communications tower was seamless. They’d gotten in, retrieved the information, and escaped without alerting anyone in the Fire Nation to their presence. Their attack on the Southern Raiders was even better -- an entire crew dispatched and the captain captured. Zuko often told the little voice in the back of his head that harbored hopeful thoughts for his future with Katara to shut up and go away. It was harder, though, when they were obviously such a good match. She  _ had  _ to see it too. 

It wasn’t until they cornered the captain of the Southern Raiders that Zuko worried he might have made an error in judgement. They battered the captain to the ground. Zuko had his foot on the man’s back. But the captain kept his story, pretending he didn’t know anything. 

“Let him up,” Katara said. 

Zuko did as he was told. Whatever Katara needed on this venture, he would do it. 

The captain nervously pushed himself up. Then his head twisted violently. One arm shot backwards. Awkwardly, the man got to his feet. He shook the entire time. Odd, choking sounds came out of his mouth.

“What?” Zuko glanced back at Katara and saw that her arms were outstretched, her focus on the captain. “Katara? What are you doing?” 

“Tell me what happened to my mother!” she screamed. 

Tears leaked out of the captain’s eyes. He still couldn’t move under his own control. All of his limbs and muscles and movements were under Katara’s control. Zuko had never seen anything like it. It was -- it was terrible. It was awful. Zuko had seen a lot in his life, but this he could barely look at. 

_ Whatever she needs _ . 

This wasn’t her. Not who she wanted to be. There would be a day, soon enough, when she regretted the control she exerted over this man. And what would she think of her friend, the partner that didn’t stop her, then? 

“Katara…” 

The captain sagged to the floor. He no longer shook and though he gasped for breath, it was his own body doing it. 

“It’s not him,” she said. Her voice was hollow. 

“How do you know?” 

“The eyes.” She was already turning to leave. 

“What was that?” Zuko asked later, when they were in the air again. Katara had joined him in the saddle, letting Appa find the way to their next destination.

Katara didn’t pretend to misunderstand his question. She averted her eyes and clenched her jaw. 

“It’s terrible,” she said. “Bloodbending. It was developed by a waterbender, while she was imprisoned. She did horrible things, harmed innocent people. She was a monster. She wanted me to be like her -- I guess I am.” 

“You’re not,” Zuko said. 

When she looked at him, her expression changed for the first time since they had begun their journey. For the first time she gave up the charade that she was a lone wolf. When she looked at Zuko, she needed something from him. 

“How do you know?” Her voice was barely above a whisper. 

“Everyone’s got dark and light inside. Bloodbending -- its the darker part of you. But you aren’t defined by your worst parts, or your best. It’s a combination of all of those things. And… I’ve seen you. Katara. You’re better than your worst impulses.” 

“Are you talking about me? Or you?” Katara asked. Her blue eyes were bright, challenging him. 

Zuko sat back on his heels. This was it. He had to do it. “Katara. I’m sorry. I’ve owed you an apology for a long time. A really long time. I’ve been too scared to say it. But, if we’re talking about regrets then -- my biggest regret is Ba Sing Se.” 

Katara’s expression was unreadable. 

“You -- when you were put down there with me, you had no reason to trust me, or even to let me live. Even so, we found a way to survive. Together. We relied on each other. And…”  _ Say it _ . “I broke that. Smashed it. Of all the terrible things I’ve done in my life, that’s the one I worry I’ll never be able to make up for.” 

Katara picked at her nails. When she spoke, she didn’t respond to him. She didn’t accept his apology; she didn’t reject it. “So then what do I do when I meet  _ him  _ tomorrow? What if… what if bloodbending isn’t my worst impulse? What if my biggest regret isn’t in my past?” 

Zuko didn’t know if he could touch her. He wanted to wrap her in his arms and make her feel safe, for even a moment. But he knew that wasn’t a good idea. Not yet. So Zuko put his hand next to hers on the saddle and let her choose. She looked at his hand and looked at his face and didn’t move. Zuko felt disappointment swell through his body like a waterfall, but he drained it away. He was good at that. 

“Aang is going to have to kill my father,” Zuko said. “It’s the right thing to do, in this situation, even though it’s a terrible act. And… I’m going to have to help him. Kill my father. I may never be forgiven for that. We’re all being pressed by problems we didn’t start. But we’re the ones who have to finish them. If tomorrow you choose to finish what the Southern Raiders started, it doesn’t make you a bad person. All of the good you have put into the world is more important. If this is what you need to do to move forward -- it’s what the world needs.” 


	22. Unconditionally (Katara)

Katara

 _Unconditionally_

Katara stopped the rain. The man on the ground’s eyes widened. Yon Rha was afraid -- like she had been. Katara found that she liked the fear, wanted more of it. When he was afraid, she was in control. When Katara was in control, there was nothing she couldn’t do. 

Zuko stood in the background, silent, unintrusive. He had his swords out, ready to back her up if she needed him. She didn’t need him. 

The water Katara had been holding back formed into huge shards of ice. She sent them hurtling towards the man who had killed her mother. Inches above him she stopped them. They quivered in the air. His eyes darted from one to one, unable to choose which to focus on. She leaned in close. 

_You need to face this man_. The memory of Aang’s words intruded. 

_Here I am! Face to face with him._

_Please don’t choose revenge._

Karata’s nostrils flared. 

_Let your anger out_. 

A ragged scream escaped from Katara’s mouth. The ice shattered. Splinters flew, cutting Yon Rha’s face, Katara’s arms, reaching as far back as Zuko. _Happy now? My anger’s out_. Once released, would it ever go back in? She battered the former captain. A water whip, feet frozen to the ground, smothered in water-logged mud. 

_Let it go._

“NO! He doesn't deserve to live,” Katara informed the sky and the water pounding down on her hair. Then she stalked over to the man who had torn her life apart, who had ripped her mother from her, and Katara informed him as well. “You don’t deserve to live.” 

Yon Rha didn’t seem to disagree with her statement; he was just afraid to die. 

“But you know what I don’t deserve? I don’t deserve this. Not anymore.” 

With both hands, she sent him rolling down the hill. Then she walked away. 

Zuko followed her without a word. He sheathed his swords and walked a few paces behind her all the way back to Appa. He was giving her space. _Why_? Was he afraid? Was he impressed? Did he think she was weak for letting Aang’s words get to her? 

Instead of mounting up, Katara turned on her heel. Zuko wasn’t as far back as she expected. He nearly rammed into her. 

“Whoa,” he said softly, putting his hands on her shoulders to steady himself. Katara’s blue eyes held him in place. 

“You would have let me kill him?”

Zuko considered her question, then nodded. 

The tears that had been missing on their journey welled up in Katara’s eyes. She couldn’t hold them back. Sobs wracked her body, threatening to tear her in half. Strong arms encircled her. She pressed her face into Zuko’s chest, letting her tears mix with the rain in his soaked tunic. 

“What if I had done it?” she asked shakily. 

Zuko said nothing. 

“I’d be a monster like him.” 

Zuko shook his head. “You could never be a monster.” 

“Aang would never forgive me.” 

“His whole thing is forgiveness,” said Zuko with a snort. “He’d find a way to follow his own advice.” 

Katara craned her head so that she could see Zuko’s face. The rain made his hair stick to his skin. She reached up to push it to the side. Zuko’s fingers locked around her wrist, holding her where she was. She pulled slightly, testing if he would let her go. He didn’t. 

Gold pouring into her soul, Zuko tilted his head and pressed his lips against her wrist. They were cold and slippery from the rain, but also searing hot. “That’s power,” he mumbled into her skin. Sparks traveled through her arm into her chest. “I’ve traveled all over the world. Every continent, every nation. I’ve never seen anyone as powerful as you were today. It’s a gift and a burden. You are responsible with choosing how to use your power. But the choice is _yours_. Katara’s. I trust your choices completely.” 

Katara returned her face to his chest. Her tears had disappeared but if she pressed her forehead hard enough, she could hear his heart pounding in his chest. There, surrounded by him, was safe. With Zuko, Katara realized there was a safety she’d never felt before. 

He saw her. Truly. He saw her bloodbend -- and not to save herself or her friends. He saw her choose power for power’s sake. He saw her enjoy it. Without needing time to process, time to forgive, he accepted her, valued her power. Zuko trusted her. Unconditionally. 

If she was going to stand, sobbing, wrapped up in him -- if she was going to let him kiss her (wrist) -- maybe it was time for Katara to tell Sokka that she had decided to trust Zuko as well. 


	23. Like Friends (Katara)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrote this chapter a few weeks ago -- but it fits with the current cabin fever I know a lot of us are dealing with!

Katara

_Like Friends_

“You all can’t be serious!” Suki put herself in between her friends and the front door. She looked from one face to the next, trying to find a sane one among them. She appealed to Katara and Sokka, always the pragmatists. Sokka just shrugged. “This is a terrible idea! I know that you guys have been on the run for, like, years, but you all are famous. Everyone knows about the kid with the arrow tattoos, his two Water Tribe buddies, and their blind earthbending friend. We are in the middle of the Fire Nation! We are literally hiding out in the Fire Lord’s summer home. You have to see why going out into the village is a terrible idea!” 

“People on Ember Island are idiots,” Zuko said. “They are totally removed from the Fire Nation and anything that’s happening in the war. It’s why this house was built here, it’s supposed to be an escape from all of the politics in the capital.” 

“Zuko.” She turned to face him “I’m sorry, but if you think people in the Fire Nation aren’t talking about the prince, _with a burn scar on his face_ I have news for you. No one is _that_ removed.” Zuko rolled his eyes. 

“I know you’re looking out for us,” said Toph, “but honestly, fighting a bunch of Fire Nation tourists is more preferable to being trapped in this house for another day.” 

Sokka, Katara, Aang, Toph, and Zuko moved towards the door. 

“Fine!” Suki raised her hands in surrender. “Okay, I see your point. Let’s go to the private beach, another game of footvolley sounds great!” 

Katara stepped forward. “Suki, we need to get away from each other. We’re the only people we’ve seen in weeks. If we’re stuck with each other for much longer, we may kill each other. And that’s not metaphorical. We are all capable of actually, literally killing one another.” 

Zuko laughed and Katara caught his gaze for a perfect millisecond. 

“Okay,” said Suki. She raised her hands in surrender. “We can go out. But please, please, please, you cannot want to go to a play _about yourselves_.” 

“How about this?” suggested Katara. “We go out, have a nice day, meet up at the playhouse and decide if we want to see the play then.” 

Suki shook her head but relented. “Fine. Have it your way. I guess I’ll see whoever survives later.” 

“That’s the spirit!” said Aang, pushing open the door. 

“Wait!” Suki was back in front, blocking their progress. 

“Babe!” Sokka exclaimed. “We’ve gone incognito in the Fire Nation before.” 

Suki smiled at her boyfriend and laid a hand on his cheek. “I just worry about you flashing those baby blues all over the place. Babe.” Sokka nearly melted from the obvious flattery. It was revolting really, to have to see one’s brother in such a state. Suki turned to the others with a triumphant grin. “We can still go out _and_ be smart at the same time. We’ll divide into pairs, that way no one has to be alone, and the Fire Nation is looking for a larger group anyways. Hmm,” she took a step back and surveyed her friends. 

“I’ll go with Toph,” she decided. “Two earth kingdom sisters, visiting the island. But no bending blind girl, that will be a dead give away. Emphasis on dead.” 

Toph groaned but agreed. 

“Sokka, where’s your beard? If you put that on, you can go with Aang. Father and son. It’ll be perfect.” 

“Aang’s too pale to be my son. On the other hand, I do love my beard.” 

“Katara and Zuko… I guess.” Suki shrugged like it was no big deal, like Katara’s heart wasn’t dancing a jig in her ribcage. “Katara, don’t make direct eye contact with anyone, and Zuko -- have you ever tried makeup?”

“I am not putting on makeup,” Zuko growled. 

Suki rolled her eyes. 

“Lighten up, tough guy,” Katara said. “It’s not going to make you any less of a man.” 

“Yeah!” said Sokka. “I wore makeup on Kyoshi island. It’s not even a big deal.” 

Against his better judgement, Zuko’s face was slathered in concealing paint and his hair put into a knot. He and Katara ventured out after everyone had left. 

“Why does Aang only have to wear a hat?” he grumbled. “I could just put my hair down over my eye, no one would see.” 

Katara laughed. “They would totally see. And I think you look better when you aren’t hiding behind all that hair.” Heat blossomed over her cheeks. Things like that were slipping out more and more since their expedition to the Southern Raiders. The trip felt like a physical presence that silently observed their every action. If she concentrated, she could feel the burn of his lips on her wrist. She didn’t hate the heat. 

When Zuko spoke, his voice was hard. “You think I look better without the scar.” 

“No.” Katara stopped where she was. That wasn’t what she meant at all. Zuko without the scar… wasn’t Zuko. Zuko without the scar would still be prince of the Fire Nation, still brainwashed by his father and sister, still an enemy. Words started tumbling out of her mouth. “That’s not what I meant. I meant… what I said. I mean, when you’re hiding behind your hair, no one can see your eyes. _Both_ of your eyes. I like being able to see your eyes.” 

Zuko turned back slowly, wearing a crooked grin. Katara’s mouth dropped open and her entire face went beet red. “You’re… so _annoying_!” 

Zuko didn’t respond, just kept grinning. Katara slapped his arm and strode off toward town. 

“Oh, come on!” Zuko said running after her. Katara rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. She was hideously embarrassed, yet simultaneously felt like she was hovering a foot off the ground. Zuko wanted her to say something nice about him, about his appearance. _Stay calm._

Katara pushed ahead. “What’s our cover story? Brother and sister?” 

“We don’t look anything alike.”

“Okay… classmates? Or maybe, okay hear me out, we were on a cruise that got shipwrecked. We were the only survivors and we’ve just made it back to shore after six months--” 

“Katara,” Zuko interrupted. He bit his lip. “Kinda feels like you’re jumping through hoops to avoid the obvious.”

Katara stammered through her denial, completely undermining her assertion that she didn’t know what he meant. 

“Katara of the Southern Water Tribe,” Zuko said, getting down on one knee. “Will you be my fake girlfriend for an afternoon so that we aren’t discovered by Fire Nation soldiers that will imprison us for the rest of our lives?” 

The temperature of the warm day increased. 

She laid a hand on his outstretched palm and put the other to her temple. “Prince Zuko, I literally, legitimately, never, ever, ever thought you would ask. I accept.” 

When they got into town, they continued the joke, loudly referring to one another as “sweetie” and “darling.” It was marvelous to be out of the house, and pretending to be carefree was almost as good as actually being carefree. They walked around shops, got food at a local market, and queued up with a large group to watch a group of street performers. Katara felt insanely guilty and incredibly free -- as if she were a hot air balloon whose sandbags had all been cut at once. Out by the ocean, Katara gifted Zuko a seashell, which he put behind his ear. 

“Oh! Young love!” an incredibly old voice called out to them. 

Katara and Zuko were startled. They turned to see a toothless old woman smiling at them. Zuko raised an eyebrow at Katara, which she answered with the smallest of shrugs. 

“I was just about to pack up and go home, but you have to let me do your portrait!” the woman continued. “Totally free! I just love love.” 

“That’s okay--” Zuko started to say. 

“I insist! Today the world is full of war and destruction. Love existing in a world like that… it’s the most powerful force out there.” 

“We’re not in love.” Katara giggled.

The old woman narrowed her eyes and smirked. “You didn’t see the way he looked at you, dear. When you picked up the seashell. He had no idea what you were going to give him and he was already delighted.” 

Katara felt heat on her cheeks and glanced at Zuko. He was resolutely not looking at her. 

“And you,” the woman pointed at Katara. “You walk like every movement is a dance.” 

Katara could feel her heart inflating, lifting her whole being into the sky.

“We’re just friends,” said Zuko flatly. _Crash_. She was annoyed and annoyed that she was annoyed. This is exactly why she’d avoided Aang’s attempts to be with her. There was no time for all of this nonsense. 

“Yeah,” Katara added. “Just friends having a nice day.” 

The old woman regarded them for a long moment. Then her face brightened again. “Okay! Then let an old woman paint a portrait of two friends.” 

Karata glanced at Zuko. He shrugged. 

The woman set up a canvas and paintbrush. “Get closer together!” she ordered. “You’re friends, not strangers on a dock. You, young man, put your arm around her… in a friendly way. And you, sweetheart, place your hand on his chest. Like _friends_.” 

When the woman was done it was clear that she did not think they were friends. 

“What are we going to do with this?” Zuko asked. If they brought it back to the house, there would be no end to the teasing and the hurt feelings. They were days away from Sozin’s comet. It couldn’t be worse timing. Still, Katara looked at the painting wistfully. In it she saw a happy girl, held in loving arms. It was a fantasy for a girl who had been living on the run for the past year and a boy who had abandoned every he had ever had. She ached for it.

“I want to keep it,” Katara decided. 

“What? Why?” 

“I dunno. We look happy. It’s nice. And unlike some people, I don’t have a lot of portraits of myself. Unless wanted posters count. Don’t worry, I won’t show anyone that you know how to smile.” 

“Hmph.” 

“There’s just one detail missing.” Katara leaned over and rubbed her thumb into the ground. She transferred the dirt onto the page, right over Zuko’s left eye. She held up the finished product for him to see. Instead of seeing a random couple, Zuko saw himself, holding Katara in his arms. His heart sprouted wings.


	24. A Very Good Bad Play (Zuko)

Zuko

_ A Very Good Bad Play _

The play was awful. Not only was the acting overdone and effects corny, the content itself was agonizing. They sat way up high in the back, but Zuko felt like there was a spotlight focused on them. Only Toph seemed to be enjoying the production and the 6 foot, 200 hundred pound muscle man that was playing her. 

Then, it got worse. Zuko sat completely still in the darkness, watching a recreation of one of the biggest regrets of his life, played for laughs on stage. Some ridiculous actor, who didn’t know a thing about what Zuko had experienced, made loud, boastful claims in a bad recreation of the crystal caves, while a big-breasted Katara swooned. Even worse, he was seated between Aang and Katara. When the actor playing Katara told the world that she saw the Avatar as nothing more than a little brother, the real Avatar’s head whipped around to look at her, at them. Actor Zuko and actor Katara kissed. It was a long-drawn out affair with lots of stomach-turning noises. It was nothing like the furtive brush of skin that maybe didn’t even count as a kiss at all? The seconds stretched on and Zuko considered revealing their presence to the theater, just to make it stop. 

At intermission, Aang and Katara disappeared while Sokka and Suki went to go find the actors. Zuko was left with Toph. 

“So…” the little girl started. “Enjoying the play?” 

“No.” 

Toph nodded. “Yeah, that makes sense. So, uh, how much would you say is, umm,  _ accurate _ ?” 

“None of this is accurate!” Zuko yelled. “This entire play is ridiculous!” 

Toph merely laughed and Zuko was reminded of a line from the play, something about protesting too much. He crossed his arms and scowled at the ground until the third act started. Zuko sat in the dark, inches from Katara. The play dropped into the background, while the space on Zuko’s left side seemed to fill with electricity. Could she feel it too? Was she sweating and thinking about the air between their bodies? Was she comparing it to the last time they were this close, the last time they were alone in the dark? 

She put a hand on the bench between them. What did that mean? Did it mean anything? Zuko forced himself to stare straight ahead, but all of his attention was on her hand. Slowly, he unfolded his own hands in his lap and placed his right hand on the bench. They weren’t touching, but Zuko could feel the connection anyways. Infinitesimally small movement by infinitesimally small movement, their hands moved closer and closer. By the end of the play, their pinkies were lined up. Zuko could tell this was the last scene, the last moment of darkness and the last moment of crazy tension between them. He slipped his pinky over hers. 

Katara curled her pinky finger, as if to hug his. 

Then the lights came up, the actors bowed, the audience cheered, and they left the best terrible play Zuko had ever seen. 


	25. Never Irresponsible (Katara)

Katara

_Never Irresponsible_

Katara could see that Zuko wanted more from her, as if holding hands while sitting next to Aang wasn’t already a ridiculous thing to do! She did her best to avoid him -- but they lived in the same house. When a quiet knock came on her bedroom door, she knew who it was. 

“Can we talk?” Zuko asked softly. 

Of course they could talk. They were friends. They were teammates. They could talk and laugh and joke and discuss things that were hard and share their feelings. He could come into her room and they could sit on her bed and at some point one of them could touch the other one and then maybe they’d realize how close they were sitting, and laugh, and then stop laughing, and stare longer than felt decorous. And then they could close their eyes, guided by instinct and feeling. He would softly push her back onto the bed, their lips never losing contact; she would hold on to his chest, his shoulders, his neck, hard enough to let him know she never wanted to let him go. 

_Holy shit._

“Let’s go outside,” she suggested too brightly. There was a full moon tonight. That would help clear her head. They walked all the way down to the Fire Lord’s private beach. Katara put her feet in the water, comforted by the coolness and the gentle current. 

“What’s up?” she asked, forcing cheer into her voice. 

Zuko shrugged and kicked water towards the horizon. “Crazy play.” 

“It was terrible. Too bad it’s the only one I’ve ever seen.” 

“You need to get a life.” 

“Hey! I have a life.” 

Zuko nodded. “I’d like to take you to see a good play. Someday.” 

_Stay calm._ The water, which was meant to sooth, seemed to be pushing her towards him. It just wasn’t a good idea, no matter how much she wanted it. She had said the same thing to Aang earlier that evening. There was just too much at stake. It would be irresponsible to add another complication. Katara was never irresponsible. 

“I would like to see a good play. Someday.” 

“Hmm,” Zuko tapped his chin. “With me? Or… is there someone else who wants to take you?” 

Katara growled and kicked the water. Zuko smiled behind his hair. 

“He likes you.” 

How could she deny it? 

“Do you like him?” 

Katara laughed, pushing the sound out across the water, into the night sky. 

“Ouch,” Zuko observed. 

“No, no.” Katara held up a hand. “It’s not that.” And it wasn’t. How was being loved by the Avatar, the universe’s pick for a perfect person, a laughing matter? No, she laughed at the utter ridiculousness of the situation she found herself in. Katara didn’t like how Zuko could unbalance her so easily. Was her effect on him the same? 

“I did like Aang,” Katara said matter of factly. Zuko did seem to lose a fraction of his grip on solid ground. Very satisfying. “Can you blame me? He was the first boy that I met outside of my village. He was the only one even close to my age that wasn’t my brother.” She rolled her eyes. 

“But then?” Zuko wanted a particular answer. That was clear. _Then I met a dashing stranger in an underground city and all thoughts of tattooed boy monks were pushed out of my pretty little head_ . She could give him that answer. Or she could tell him that for a moment, in the underground city, she couldn’t even remember the tattooed boy monk’s name. But then reality crashed in -- and they both chose their sides. For months after, every feeling was tangled together like a swampbender’s beard. And only since their revenge quest had things started to untangle. She could tell him _that_. 

Instead, she smiled, knowing exactly what she wanted to say. “Zuko? I forgive you.” 

His brow furrowed. Damn, he was cute when he was confused. She took a step closer. “When we went after the Southern Raiders, before we found Yon Rha -- you apologized. For Ba Sing Se. And, honestly? I could not think about that on top of everything else.” Zuko chuckled. “Ever since then -- I think I’ve been avoiding thinking about it. Hating you was a really central part of my identity.” 

His eyes opened wide and he shook his head real slow like, _You don’t make it easy for a guy do you?_

“ _But_ ,” Katara emphasized the word. “I don’t need to think about it anymore. I forgive you. I think… I was so confused for so long, about why you didn’t… choose me? But that sounds ridiculous. You’d known me for a few hours, our countries have been at war for our whole lives. Like you said, problems we didn’t start.” 

“Katara…” 

“It was your family, I get that.” Katara turned back to the horizon, the words fighting to get out of her now. “When we went to find the man who killed my mother--” she stumbled, but continued, despite the itchiness in her eyes and the lump in her throat-- “I realized that I would do anything to have her back. I could have done anything. You didn’t judge me for that. How can I judge you for what you did? It was for your family.” 

Zuko sucked in a deep breath. 

“You have no idea how much that means to me,” he whispered to the sea.

Was this the moment? Would he turn to her, grab her hand, pull her in close? 

But Zuko was lost in the pull and push of the waves. So Katara took his hand and watched the currents with him. 

“You’re the ocean,” he said after a long while. “Fierce, and strong, and capable of destruction. Yet -- here it is, same ocean, the most calming thing in the world. Making everything better.” He dropped her hand to drape his arm around her shoulder and pull her even closer. This was it. Katara felt the ocean on her feet and the moon above her head. Their whole bodies were lined up, if they both turned their necks… 

Zuko stepped away so he could look at Katara directly. His gold eyes were pale in the moonlight. “Katara, you’re beautiful. I spent so much of my life pretending I didn’t want the things I did. I’m not doing that anymore. I want you. I think I’m… you do something to me, my head, my heart. But -- I realize you have another option and I don’t want to be unfair and force you to choose.” 

_Wait, what?_ Katara realized that she had skipped the part of her history with Aang where she found that affection and love weren’t the same thing. She had skipped the part where Aang took his place in her heart as her best friend. She would always love Aang, fight for him, protect him, care for him, die for him. But when the lights were out in the middle of the night and she let the small part of her mind explore her feelings… there was no question. 

“I’m going to go to bed,” said Zuko, sounding like he was making a very big and important sacrifice for the greater good. “Thank you for talking with me. When you’re ready to decide, let me know. I can wait.” 

With that, Zuko was splashing his way back to dry land. Katara’s whole body was still leaning towards where he had been, ready for something completely different. He was halfway up the cliff steps before she found her voice. 

“Zuko!” She slapped a hand to her mouth, then continued in a whisper. “It’s not about _deciding_ . I already know.” Katara jumped out of the water. She was halfway up the stairs before her responsible side took over. She couldn’t kiss Zuko -- in the middle of the night -- on a deserted beach -- with the full moon shining -- _fuck_ \-- she couldn’t do that until she talked to Aang. It wouldn’t be right. So instead of grabbing Zuko’s shoulders and kissing him into oblivion, Katara took his hand like that was her plan the whole time, and they walked home together. 

“Good night, Katara.” 

“Good night, Zuko.” 

  
  
  



	26. Girl Talk (Toph)

Toph

_ Girl Talk _

When Suki leaned over and whispered in Toph’s ear that it was time for Girl Talk, Toph’s instincts were to laugh, be dismissive, and immediately tell the boys. She was very proud of herself that she held down those instincts and only nodded. As they walked to the beach, Toph was elated. 

The first thing she said was: “This better not be some dumb gossip session about  _ feelings _ .” She pointed a finger at Suki. “I know I can’t ‘see’ on the wooden floors inside, but we do share a wall.” 

The ground Suki stood on went white hot. Toph grinned. 

“Be nice, Toph,” said Katara, for whom being nice is natural. “Or you won’t be invited next time.” 

Toph stuck out her tongue and hoped very much that she would be invited next time. 

And then no one said anything, for like a whole minute. Toph told herself to wait and be patient. She was new to Girl Talk; she should observe. But why was no one talking? It was called Girl Talk. Not girl shuffle-in-the-sand-and-ignore-each-other. 

“Well? Someone  _ talk! _ ” Toph commanded. 

“I don’t know what we’re talking about,” said Katara, lying.  _ Interesting _ .

Suki chuckled. “Okay, I’ll start.” 

“I do  _ not  _ want to hear about my brother.” 

“Well, lucky for you, I don’t want to talk about your brother. I want to talk about… the most eligible bachelorette on Ember Island.” 

Ooooooooo, Toph knew where this was going. And she had some  _ info _ . 

“Uhh, I don't know what you’re talking about.” 

“Liar!” Toph exclaimed. “You and Zuko were holding hands at the play!” 

Toph heard Katara gasp like she had just been punched and Suki gasp like she had just been gifted a surprise hawktiger. 

“What?  _ Katara _ !” 

“I thought you couldn’t see through wood!” Katara growled. 

“The  _ floor  _ was stone,” Toph informed her friend. 

Katara made some sort of frustrated noise and started pacing. Toph waited. She told herself that she should approach Girl Talk like a duel. If you did nothing, eventually your opponent would strike. 

“Okay, fine! Fine. You guys wanna know the truth so bad?” Katara tried to make it sound like she was annoyed, but there was something expressly joyful in her tone. She put her hands on her hips and stood like she was the one winning a victory. “Yeah, Zuko and I -- we held hands, at the play. But…” She drifted off.

“But?” Suki prompted. 

“We kissed,” Katara whispered. 

Outsiders observing the beach might have thought a bomb went off. 

“WHAT.” 

“Tell us everything! When? Where? How many times!” 

Katara sat on the beach and Suki and Toph joined her. She told them about the kiss. But it wasn’t some stolen moment on the island paradise. It was in prison, under Ba Sing Se. Suki reached out to touch their friend. Toph didn’t know what to do. Girl Talk had turned from teasing to emotional trauma so quickly -- how could anyone keep up? 

“Typical,” Katara commented. “Not even gossip can be fun with us.” 

“Hey!” Toph said. “We’re having fun. Even though, well, okay, that all sounds upsetting and scarring. But Zuko’s our friend now. Everything’s going to be okay!” 

Toph could feel Katara’s body relax, then she tightened again, hugging her knees to her chest and putting her forehead on her arms. Her voice was muffled when she spoke again. 

“No, it’s not!” she moaned. “Zuko might be our friends right now, but there’s still…” 

“Aang,” said Suki. 

Toph sat perfectly still, trying to pretend that she knew about this world-shattering news as well. It didn’t go well. “WHAT. AANG? WHAT DID YOU DO WITH AANG?” 

Suki and Katara fell over themselves laughing and Toph knew she was blushing. 

“Oh. I guess I’m just the stupid one,” she muttered. 

“No! Toph!” Suki leaned over to nudge Toph with her shoulder. “I didn’t know either. I was just guessing. He is always staring at Katara.” 

Katara groaned and fell back onto the sand. “And. He kissed me.” 

“Katara!” Suki gasped and Toph felt better knowing that she didn’t know everything either. 

“Okay,” said Suki, sounding very businesslike. She folded her hands in her lap. “So, Zuko kissed you in Ba Sing Se, and then Aang kissed you, when?” 

“Day of Black Sun.” 

Toph punched her friend. 

“And last night.” 

Toph punched Katara again. She rubbed her arm.

“Okay,” Suki continued. “So Zuko kissed you first. And then Aang. Then  _ last night _ you kissed Aang and held hands with Zuko. And then -- Katara how many other of our friends have you kissed? Haru? Jet? Smellerbee!?” 

Toph’s stomach did a backflip.

“Just those two.” Venom dripped from Katara’s words. 

“All right. Just those two. Just the two most opposite boys we know. Who hated each other for... _ ever _ . Who have to work together or we’re all gonna die. The Avatar .. and the prince of the Fire Nation. Just those two.” 

Katara snorted. 

“Well, damn, Katara. Who do you like?” Toph asked. 

Katara groaned again. 

“Okay.” Toph stretched out the word, because she wasn’t entirely sure how this was going to be okay. But it would, somehow. They all lived their lives with “it’ll be okay -- somehow.” In comparison to taking out the most powerful firebender in the world on the day all firebenders would be invincible, Katara and Zuko making it as a couple was cake. 

“Have you talked to him?” 

“Which one?” 

Suki nudged Toph again. “Which one  _ have  _ you talked to?” 

“Zuko.” 

“What did you guys say?” 

“We confessed our undying love for each other.” 

“ _ Really _ ?” 

“No. But… guys.” Katara sat up. “He said -- I mean, he said  _ everything _ . It was… really nice. And then he said he wouldn’t bother me until the war was over.”

“Hmm.” Toph tapped her finger on her chin. “That’s a very  _ one-sided _ conversation.” 

Katara kicked her feet in the sand and mumbled something under her breath. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear that,” Toph lied. She had very good hearing. 

“I said I liked him too.” Katara took a deep breath and then let everything out. “He was worried because he knows Aang likes me and Aang and I talked during that  _ stupid _ play and so Zuko thought maybe I had feelings for Aang. But I was just telling Aang that I didn’t know how I felt, which was a  _ lie  _ because then later that night I told Zuko that I wasn’t deciding between him and Aang, I’d already decided and I’d decided on him. SO I GUESS I’LL JUST GO LIGHT MYSELF ON FIRE.” 

Toph and Suki were silent out of respect for their friend’s impossible position. For approximately seven seconds. 

“I know someone who could light you on fire,” Suki said. “If you know what I mean.” 

Even Katara laughed. 

“I just … I feel guilty. I don’t want to hurt Aang.” 

“Yeah, but you’re not gonna be with him just to save his feelings,” said Toph. She knew she was oversimplifying it. This was all wayyyyy too complicated. That was something Toph could relate to; she knew complicated. “Aang’s gonna be fine. He’s thirteen. And he’s the Avatar. He’ll rebound quick enough.” 

Katara didn’t seem convinced. Toph tried nudging Suki, like the older girl had done earlier. She was pretty sure she crashed into her like a rockslide, but Suki got the message. 

“So!” she said in a bright voice. “Now that that’s settled, let’s get to the real reason we’re down here. Katara, your brother is really hot.” 

“ _ Hauhhh! _ Suki!” Katara pretended to vomit into the sand. 

“Really, like you guys in the water tribe are beautiful people. And, even more, you guys really… know how to… paddle a canoe, if you know what I mean.” 

Toph’s sides hurt from laughing as Katara scooped sand at Suki and begged her to stop. As they continued to tease each other like normal teenagers, Toph reflected that her first Girl Talk had gone pretty well. So well in fact that she could imagine another session happening in the future. At that hypothetical future time, Toph could tell Suki and Katara something… big. If Katara could confess to making out with the prince of the Fire Nation and the Avatar, then what Toph had to say wouldn’t be a big deal at all.


	27. Blue & Gold (Katara & Zuko)

Katara

_Blue and Gold, Part 1_

Katara had gone to bed knowing that she would see Aang in the morning. When the sun rose, she was wrong. Aang’s absence weighed on all of them, even as they tried not to acknowledge it. _If the Avatar had abandoned their quest, then it really must be hopeless._ Katara didn’t believe that Aang had abandoned them. He wouldn’t. He had run away in the past, when he was alone. Now he had his friends and he would never leave them. Never. 

It was Zuko who stepped up and took control. Everyone had their tasks -- Iroh and White Lotus would take back Ba Sing Se. Suki, Toph, and Sokka would ground the air fleet. And Katara -- Zuko had asked her to help him face Azula. Katara could see why Iroh thought Zuko would make a good Fire Lord. He didn’t give in to hopelessness. 

They all agreed on the plan, though each knew that their individual tasks, even if successful, would mean nothing if Aang didn’t return. They each had enough trust to face their own part of today. Some part of each of them still believed. 

Katara tried to ignore the butterflies in her stomach when he asked her to accompany him. It made strategic sense. Fire and water balanced each other out when set as opposites. Put together, the two elements were formidable. Would it be enough to equal Azula’s strength? 

Katara reflected that she should have kissed him on the beach.

Saying goodbye was the hardest part. 

Sokka worked his jaw while he tried to come up with something to say. “You’re gonna beat her. Of all the people in the world, you’re the one that can do it,” he whispered. “But -- dammit, I’m your older brother. I’m supposed to protect you, keep you safe.” 

Katara pulled her brother close. He squeezed her back. 

“You’re an excellent older brother, Sokka. The best.” 

“I love you, Katara.” 

“I love you too.” 

“Tell Azula she’s lucky I’m not coming for her,” said Toph, smacking her fist into her palm. “And you know… look after yourself. Don’t go getting struck by lightning.” 

Katara chuckled. “Okay, sounds like a deal. And you, let Sokka and Suki do _something_ , okay?” 

Toph nodded and hugged Katara too.

Suki stepped up last. “Don’t go getting distracted on the ride over,” she said, with a small smile. Katara laughed and promised to keep her hands to herself.

They left, Sokka glaring suspiciously at Suki and Katara. Katara watched her family and her best friends disappear. Then she went to find Zuko. He was saying goodbye to Iroh when she found him. She kept her distance. When Zuko left to join Katara, Iroh caught her gaze. It made her ache for her Grangran. 

When they got to Appa, Zuko extended his hand to boost her up into the saddle. Instead, she took it in her’s and they stared into each other’s eyes. Blue and gold. 

“I’m glad you’re coming with me,” said Zuko. 

Katara’s stomach jumped into her throat as they turned over the words she wanted to say in her mind. Finally: “It’s where I should be.” 

Zuko smiled. Despite the chaos going on around them, despite the dread that threatened to overwhelm, Zuko smiled. Katara found that she could smile too. 

  
  


Zuko

_Blue and Gold, Part 2_

Zuko should have kissed her. He should have left her behind. He should have been selfish. He should have been selfless. His thoughts warred as he steered Appa to the Fire Nation capital, back to his home. 

Azula would be enraged to see Katara. The very waterbender that Azula had tried to weaponize against Zuko, now back to face her. Azula would be insulted. She would target Katara. It might be enough to unbalance his perpetually balanced sister, but Zuko knew he didn’t care about the strategic advantage. Not when the cost was so high. 

_I should turn around_. 

Katara sat in the saddle. They didn’t speak. What was there to say? They were headed to victory or death. No in betweens. If they won -- then they would finally be together. If they died… _I should have kissed her!_ Zuko should crawl back into the saddle and kiss her and not stop until they arrived. And if Appa got lost along the way, they would settle down wherever Appa landed and never face the world again. 

Zuko didn’t do that. He stayed where he was and aimed the air bison toward his sister. 

When they landed, it was clear that something was wrong. They faced no opposition getting to the palace. There was no one there to offer opposition. There was no one there… period. Out of the corner of his eye, Zuko saw movement. 

“Hey!” He yelled, but the figure just ran away, away from the palace. 

Katara looked at him questioningly. “She’s in there,” Zuko said with certainty. “If Fire Nation citizens are fleeing the palace, there’s only one person who scared them away.” He took Katara’s hand, squared his shoulders, and entered the home of the Fire Lord. 

They moved through the cavernous hallways cautiously, but they were all empty. The torches in the sconces on the walls were unlit. There was complete, pervasive silence. Outside the throne room, Zuko motioned for Katara to stand back as he kicked open the doors. He whirled around in a fighting stance, but the throne room was as empty as the rest of the palace. 

“Is she -- Did she leave too?” Katara asked. 

“I don’t think so,” Zuko said. “It wouldn’t be like her.” 

“Is this some trap?” 

“Maybe? But why didn’t they attack as soon as we entered the palace? They have the numbers, the location…” That’s when it clicked in Zuko’s mind. His heart was heavy and Katara could see his expression change. 

“What?” 

“I know where she is. Come on.” Zuko led the way to the Agni Kai chamber. Classic Azula. She never hesitated to use his own emotions against him. She wanted to make him mad by reminding him of his failure. It wouldn’t work. He was here with Katara. The memory of that first Agni Kai, which had haunted him for so long, had no more power. It had faded behind more momentous -- and joyous -- events in his life. 

Outside the door that would lead them into the open air dueling space, Zuko stopped and faced Katara. His chest filled with affection, admiration… love. He touched the sides of her face and closed his eyes, leaning down. His eyes shot open when he felt Katara’s finger press against his lips. 

“No,” she whispered. “This isn’t goodbye.” 

“But--” 

“I know what might happen. But you aren’t leaving me. We’re going together.” 

“Okay,” said Zuko, straightening. 

“I want to kiss you,” Katara said. She smiled nervously. “I guess we’re both gonna have to survive.” 

“When you put it like that…” 

“Let’s go,” Katara said, taking his hand. 

  
  


Katara

_Blue and Gold, Part 3_

They emerged into corrupted daylight. The comet raged above, turning the sky blood red. Azula sat across from the door in a throne she had clearly dragged from somewhere else. She looked… different. Everytime Katara had faced off with Azula, whether it was after a night-long chase or in caverns deep underground, the fire princess’ appearance was always immaculate. Everything from her hair to her clothes to her red lipstick was perfect for the occasion. Katara had seen her dressed as a soldier, a commander, even as a Kyoshi warrior. She always looked the part she was playing. 

But now, on the day that her family would conquer the Earth Kingdom and gain dominion over the world, Azula looked like she had just gotten out of bed. Her clothes were wrong. Her hair was a mess. The only thing that was recognizable was her smile -- hateful and superior. 

“Hello, brother.” 

“Azula. We have come to accept your surrender.”

Azula laughed, long and hard.

“Give over control of the palace and capital to me, and there doesn’t need to be any bloodshed. You have the opportunity to make peace.” Zuko had to make the offer, if he attacked first he was no better than the rest of his family. Every moment they stood out here, Katara got more and more nervous. 

“You brought a guest,” Azula continued, ignoring her brother. “How rude of me. Welcome! You’re both in time for my coronation. I would be honored, Zuko, if you would do the honors.” She gestured to a crown on the ground. “Everyone else seems to have disappeared.” 

“They left,” said Zuko, striding forward. Katara trailed him feeling exposed. But no one jumped out. They truly seemed to be the only three left. “The whole city is empty. Even if I put that on your head, you’re not queen of anyone.” 

“No. I’m the _lord_. Fire Lord Azula” 

“Azula,” Zuko’s voice was heavy. “This is your last chance to surrender peacefully. Please.” 

“Or what? You’ll attack? You and your little sidekick.” Azula twisted to address Katara over Zuko’s shoulder. “Don’t worry! There’s water in the stadium.” She pointed to the side. “We keep it here to treat _burns_.” She said the last word to her brother. 

“You’re leaving us no other choice,” said Zuko, extending his hands. 

“There’s one other choice,” Azula said. “ _Agni Kai!_ You and me, brother. It was always bound to happen. Unless you don’t think you can take me without some little girl’s help.” 

Katara rolled her eyes. They couldn’t take Azula alone. Neither of them could. That was why they had come together. 

“I accept,” Zuko said. 

“What!” Katara’s stomach sank and Azula laughed. Katara grabbed Zuko’s arm.

Zuko glanced at his sister. She lounged on the throne, inspecting her nails. “Something’s wrong, Katara,” Zuko whispered. “She’s not acting like herself. I can take her.” 

“But you don’t have to! That’s the whole point. You’re not alone.” 

Zuko nodded. “I know I’m not. But she is. She’s my sister, Katara. I have to protect her, even if it means fighting her. I can do it. I can take her down and get her somewhere safe. Somewhere maybe she can… heal.” 

Everything in Katara made her want to refuse. This was ridiculous, it was dangerous, and it was unnecessary. If Katara wasn’t going to be useful here, she should have been with her brother and her friends! She should have been looking for Aang. Had she really come all this way for some boy who didn’t even want her?

“I’ll need you,” Zuko said, as if he was reading her mind. He grabbed her hand. “Even if I win the duel, Azula’s not going to submit.” 

“So then why even do it?” Katara hissed through clenched teeth. 

“I have to.” 

“That’s stupid! If you don’t win the duel, you die!” 

Katara wasn’t whispering anymore. Azula laughed. 

“Fine.” _Fine_. If the siblings wanted to fight like children, let them. Katara stalked off to the side, but she had no intention of letting Zuko fight alone. She would wait on the sidelines, let Zuko and Azula distract each other. Then she could trap Azula. Zuko didn’t want his sister hurt? _Fine_. She would take Azula down peacefully while Azula did everything in her power to hurt, maim, and kill the person she had spent months loving in secret, who had just tried to kiss her. _Fine_. 

The siblings lined up across from each other, and right as the duel started, Katara realized her plan was not going to work. The two firebenders were both masters, and the comet above only increased their power. Fire roared and the heat was unbearable. Azula wasn’t only producing lightning, but gouts of blue fire as well. Brother and sister jumped and dodged and twisted. Katara never had the opportunity to subtly strike. Any water she tried to sneak between then would evaporate before reaching its target. Katara was stuck, on the outside of the blue and gold hellstorm. 

She stood on the sidelines, ready to move, defend, or attack, as necessary. Then, she saw Azula pause to gather the electricity in the air. Katara was directly behind Zuko, but she could tell what he was doing. He was going to redirect the bolt. He was going to let Azula strike him. 

_No_. 

  
  


Zuko

_Blue and Gold, Part 4_

Zuko heard the crackle of electricity. He could do this. He prepared his body, visualizing how the lightning would travel down one arm, through his stomach, and then up his other arm, harmlessly dissipating in the sky. 

Right as she let loose a bolt, her hips twisted. Zuko reacted without thinking. There was only one reason Azula would misaim. Zuko leapt in front of the bolt. It wrapped around his body like white hot wires. It sunk into him, piercing his skin, his eyes, his heart. Still in the air, Zuko pointed at the sky and pushed with all his worth. He saw lightning shoot up at an angle before the world went dark. 

  
  


Katara

_Blue and Gold, Part 5_

Katara was shocked still as a statue. Azula laughed and approached her brother. She kept laughing as she stood over him, as she leaned down, as she slapped his arm. Then the laughter stopped, as abruptly as if all the air had been sucked out of her body. She touched Zuko again. And again, and again, and again. He remained motionless.

When Azula rose, she was glaring at Katara, her eyes bright with hatred. 

“This is your fault!” she yelled. 

Katara gathered water to her hands, ready for Azula’s attack. 

“He’s dead!” Azula screamed. 

_No._

“Azula, get out of the way.” She had to get to him, had to heal him.

“Because of you! It should have been _you_. It should have been you!” Fire poured from Azula’s hands, taking up all the space, all the air. There was nowhere to duck or run or jump. Katara was trapped between two solid walls of fire. It hurt -- so much. Katara gasped for air and struck the only thing she could. 

Sudden cool air rushed in to replace the inferno and Azula lifted her hands furiously to see them trapped in ice. They were already dripping, already melting away. Katara screamed and launched all the water in both pools at Azula and frozen them solid. Azula glared through the ice, furious, melting the ice around her body. Katara froze it again, and again, and again. She remembered what Zuko had said -- fire came from within. A cold firebender had nothing to bend. Katara also remembered that Zuko had wished to spare his sister. Katara didn’t know how small the difference between a cold firebender and a dead firebender was -- nor did she really care.

Azula was getting weaker and more frantic. She fought against the ice and her own diminishing strength. When her fire turned orange again, then petered out entirely, she screamed, slamming her fists against her icy prison. Blood bloomed on the walls of ice and still Azula didn’t stop. She kicked and pounded on her prison. Katara had to get her under control. She would run out of air in there if she didn’t calm down. 

Katara looked around the space and found what she was looking for. She approached Azula with the chain outstretched, giving Azula one last chance to surrender. If anything, her frenzy ratched higher. Katara sighed, coated the chain in water, slipped it through the ice, and bound Azula’s hands behind her back, then cinched it to the ground. Only then did she unfreeze the ice. 

Azula took a huge gasp of air and screamed. And screamed, and screamed, and screamed. Fire surged from her mouth and she kicked wildly, sending orange fire, blue fire, and little wisps of electricity everywhere. 

Katara didn’t have time for her. She rushed to Zuko. He lay face down on the ground. He hadn’t moved.

“No,” Katara whispered. She gently turned him over and pushed off the smoking ruins of his shirt. In his chest was a nasty burn. It was raw, red, and still hot. When Katara bent water over it, it turned to steam. She preserved, pushing all of herself into her healing. She _willed_ him to come back to her. 

“No, no, NO! You _can’t_ die!

So he didn’t. 

Katara felt like she might have a heart attack herself when Zuko’s eyes fluttered. A moan of relief escaped her lips and she clutched Zuko’s shoulders. He smiled weakly. 

“Katara?” 

“Uh huh,” she said, still too weak for words. 

“Can I … kiss you _now?"_

She laughed and cried and leaned over. 

It was a terrible kiss.

Zuko’s lips barely worked and she nearly bit him trying to get as close as possible. But it was a kiss. A real, official kiss. It would always be their first kiss. 

Katara helped Zuko sit up. He gasped and squeezed his eyes closed in pain. 

“We need to get you help,” Katara said. She had brought Zuko back, but he wasn’t going to stay back for long unless they got him real help. 

“Is Azula…?” His question trailed off. 

“She’s alive.” Katara said. 

Zuko smiled through split lips. “You did it. You beat her.” 

Azula had stopped screaming, had stopped struggling. She was murmuring something. Katara approached slowly. 

“I didn’t mean to hurt him.” Over and over and over again. Even when Katara stepped in front of her, Azula didn’t seem to see her. She was talking to someone else, someone in her memories. Katara had an idea. She had never done anything like this before, but she tried. She pulled out a fist-sized amount of water and split it, creating two rotating discs. Pushing forward with her healing powers, she held the water to Azula’s temples. Azula flinched at the sensation, but then her eyes lost focus and her voice trailed off. 

“Sleep,” Katara whispered, and caught the girl as she sunk forward. 


	28. Green (Katara & Zuko)

Katara

_Green, Part 1_

It was summer in the South Pole. Brilliant sunshine filled every hour of the day. The blue glaciers turned frosty white. The days were filled with rebuilding efforts. Men who had been gone for years had returned home. The Northern Tribe, which had been cut off during the war, had joined their sister tribe. Everyone focused on rebuilding Kuya -- the abandoned capital city. 

Katara was swept up in the plans. Her idea to take some quiet weeks visiting with Grangran were overrun with activities days to night. As the last waterbender in the Southern Tribe, a master, and the companion of the Avatar, Katara found herself held in a place of reverence in both tribes. She could do without all of the bows and honorifics. It was inspiring though, helping to rebuild her home -- to restore a glory that had been robbed before she was born. 

It was almost enough of a distraction.

Nothing was more exciting than the day she lost one of her titles. A young mother, whipped into an delighted frenzy, came to inform her that she was no longer the last waterbender in the Southern Tribe. Despite the late hour, Katara raced through her old village -- past reinhabited buildings that had been abandoned for years, to see the newest miracle. 

He was a young boy, four years old. Naru. At first, he was very shy and didn’t want to show Katara what he could do. With his mother’s encouragement, they all walked down to a small creek and Katara pulled drops of water out of it. Naru chased them and popped them, and at one point reached out for one. Katara transferred it to him and saw the sphere wobble and tremble. But Naru didn’t drop it. He spun it, juggled it, lengthened it. Katara was overcome. 

She visited Naru every day. They would go to the ocean or simply stay inside and bend together. Soon it became known throughout the tribe, and folks would drop by to see the tiny waterbender. 

“It’s coming back,” said one elder, clasping Katara’s hands. “The spirits left our tribe -- to protect us. But their magic still lives in our veins. You and this young boy are our future. And they’ll be more. Little waterbenders everywhere, making our tribe strong again.” 

Katara saw it happen. She stayed as the days began to get longer. Buildings grew taller, markets more lively. In late autumn, when the Southern Lights began to dance again, there was a rash of small children who discovered their bending abilities. Their parents all brought them to Katara. Through the winter, she and Grangran, along with some of the benders from the Northern Tribe, led a daycare/bending school. The new benders, there were eleven in total, ranging from two to seven years old, were an honor and a terror to their parents. They filled Katara’s days and every night she collapsed, exhausted. 

Most nights she didn’t even dream.

One morning, as the sun began to return to the South Pole, Grangran asked Katara to sit with her for a while, instead of rushing out to school. 

“There’s plenty of folks who want to be with the miracles.” Gran smiled wryly. “Sit with an old woman for a while.” They bundled up in furs and took steaming glasses of tea to sit in brilliant blue morning. “I have loved having you home, Katara.” Gran put a comforting gloved hand over Katara’s.

“You make it sound like I’m leaving.” 

“Aren’t you?” 

Katara was confused. What had made Grangran think that? She loved being home in the South Pole. The cool air cleared her head. For the first time in years, she was her own person. She had responsibility but it didn’t threaten to crush her. She hadn’t been attacked or imprisoned or slept on the hard ground in months. She was helping rebuild the culture of her people. The South Pole was where Katara was meant to be. 

Of course, she missed her friends. Sokka had been with them briefly before making his way back to Suki at Kyoshi Island. Toph and Aang had gone their separate ways soon after the war ended. And Zuko… he had his own responsibilities. In a way it was fitting, she was rebuilding her nation, he was rebuilding his. His letters had become more and more sparse, as she knew hers had as well. Maybe all of those intense, world-shattering feelings she had held for him were a product of the intense, world-shattering way she had been living. Now that they had been restored to normalcy, their emotions had returned to normal and drifted away… 

Her chest ached. 

“I like being home, Grangran,” Katara whispered. 

“Mmm.” Gram nodded. “I chose to make the South Pole my home. It was a conscious decision, but my heart didn’t listen. My heart knew home was on the other side of the world. And how about you, hmm? Will you ever sit still when your heart is scattered around the world?”

“You want me to leave?” 

“No. I want to spend every day with you. But I know I won’t get to. You changed while you were away. You grew up, you grew beautiful, you grew strong. Your home grew as well, I think. Your home is here, but it is also in the north, and at the Air Temple, and in Ba Sing Se, and all of those places you and your brother traveled in between. It was my biggest fear when you left with the nomad that you would inherit his way of life. But seeing you now -- the confident and brave woman you became -- I don’t think I could ever make you stay.” 

“Gran… I have to stay. I’m needed here.” 

“I’m sure anywhere you go, the people will find a way to need you. You gave yourself to the world, Katara. Why do you hide from it now?” 

Katara didn’t know what to say. 

Gran reached out for her again. “Katara, you’ve told me the story of your adventures over and over, but have you told me everything? What scared you?” 

A burn. Blood-soaked bandages. Cries of anguish. An impenetrable boundary made of canvas. Her feet, unwilling to move forward. That was when the South Pole had called to her. 

“Why’re you kicking me out now? Finally getting tired of me?” Katara tried to joke. 

“I am very wise. The right moment presents itself to me… Or a messenger hawk does.” Gran winked and produced a letter from her furs. “You have a visitor.” 

Katara’s face brightened as her heart leapt into her throat. Zuko? Toph? Aang? Grangran nodded to someone over Katara’s shoulder. She whirled around. 

“Hey, sis. We’ve gotta go. Things up north are looking pretty grim.” 

xxx

“What do you mean she’s grounded?” 

Katara leaned against Sokka and Suki’s bunk in their cabin on a ship headed to the Earth Kingdom. 

“I haven’t heard from Toph in months. Have you?” Katara shook her head. “Exactly, there’s only two people in the world who could have silenced her.” 

“Her parents.” 

“Yup. She’s _grounded._ Grounded. Get it?” 

“Yeah, Sokka. I get it.” 

“Good. Because this is our most dangerous mission yet!” Sokka began to pace. Their cabin had approximately three feet of floor space between two bunks, making Sokka whip back and forth. “We liberated you from your icy prison--” 

“Our home.” 

“-- and now we go to free Toph. After that, we’re going to track down Aang in the world-wide labyrinth. Then, we have to dethrone the Fire Lord.” 

Katara glanced at Suki. “Kyoshi Island got old real quick didn’t it?” 

“How did you keep him entertained on a glacier?” Suki asked. 

xxx

The Beifong estate looked similar to the last time they had visited. The difference now was the guards posted at the gates. Two earthbending thugs shooed them away when they tried to enter the conventional way. 

“We always knew that was a long shot,” Sokka said as they walked away. “Now onto Plan B, which is really like Plan A if you think about it.”

Plan B/A was to wait until nightfall and climb the garden wall. For three teenagers who had broken into and out of multiple prisons, castles, and cities, the invasion was something of a letdown. Nonetheless, it was fun to sneak through the manor and try to find Toph’s room. It was past midnight and the house was dark and quiet. They found a door down the hall from the master bedroom that had one of Sokka’s terrible drawings of Appa tacked to it. It was sweet until they realized that Toph had no idea what was on the piece of paper. That made it even sweeter. Suki eased open the sliding door and they crept into the room. Sokka motioned to a sleeping Toph, curled under her blankets, and shook her shoulder. 

_“Agh!”_ he gasped as Toph’s body rolled in several different directions. Katara pulled her glowing green crystal from her bag and illuminated… seven watermelons. 

The three exchanged curious looks until a voice at the window startled them all. 

“I am the melon lord!” Toph declared, jumping down from the sill. 

“Toph!” Katara whisper-yelled. She pulled the girl in for a tight hug. Toph had grown since they’d last been together. Now she was the age that Katara had been when they first met, and almost Katara’s height. 

“Hey Sugar Queen,” she said. 

Sokka lifted her up in a bear hug. 

“Put me down! I can’t see anything when you do that!” 

When all greetings had been taken care of and the melons rolled away, Toph said, “So umm, what are you guys doing in my room in the middle of the night?” 

“We came to rescue you!” Sokka announced. 

“Rescue me?” 

“Yeah, we assumed that your parents were keeping you under guard or something…” Katara’s explanation drifted off. Something wasn’t right here. Clearly, Toph could get away from her parents and her house if she wanted to. “Hey Toph?” 

“Yes, Katara.” 

“Why were there a bunch of melons in your bed?”

“In case anyone broke into my room in the middle of the night.” 

“Really?” 

“No.” 

“Where were you?” 

“Fighting giant muskrat-snakes in an illegal gambling ring on top of Mount Shin.” 

Suki, Katara, and Sokka exchanged a glance. Sokka shrugged. “I don’t know. It could be true.”

“So you’re here to bust me out, huh?” Toph asked, leaning on the window. 

“Unless you don’t want to leave,” Suki said. 

Toph’s lips twisted as she thought. “Well, on the one hand, I’ve kind of put down roots since coming home. On the other -- it would really piss off my parents. Where are we going?” 

“We have no idea,” said Sokka. “It will be our most dangerous mission yet--”

“We’re going to find Aang?” 

“Yes, _but_ it could take years. We have to search every corner of the globe--” 

“I know where he is.” 

Sokka deflated. 

“Before we go, Katara, I need your help writing a letter.” 

“Okay, who’s it to?” 

“That is an excellent question. But it would be way too distracting from this current story. We’ll have to save it for next time.”

xxx

Aang, as it turned out, wasn’t far from Toph. He was in the mountains on the northern coast of the Earth Kingdom. He had stopped by the Beifong estate on his way. Being the Avatar, he hadn’t been turned away by Toph’s parents. 

“You broke that kid’s heart,” Toph informed Katara, as they rode their ostrich-horses north. 

“Thanks for the reminder.” 

“All’s fair in love and war,” Toph responded airily. “What were you going to do? Be with Aang on weekdays and Zuko on the weekends? You had to choose one or the other. You chose Zuko.” 

“Katara’s not with Zuko,” Sokka called over helpfully. 

_“Wait. What??”_

“Yeah, she ran out of the coronation before it was over. They haven’t seen each other since.” 

“Sokka!” 

“What? You’re the one who said there’s no secrets in this family.” 

“Katara! What happened?” 

A fiery crown. A heavy title. An offhand comment. The fresh air of the South Pole was easier to breathe than the oppressive humidity of the Fire Nation capital. 

“So… Aang ran away to the Se-Fu mountains for no reason?” Toph summarized. 

“He never needed to run away.” 

When they tracked him down -- to a bleak mountain valley with sparse vegetation and chilling rains -- Aang insisted that he hadn’t run away at all. “I’m doing my _duty_ ,” he insisted. “There were malignant spirits terrorizing the clans here!” At that moment a giant, shimmering, cuddly-looking monkey-sloth spirit ambled up and nuzzled Aang’s shoulder. 

Sokka, Suki, Toph, and Katara said nothing. 

“Fine.” Aang frowned. “Let’s go.” 

xxx

“Wait! We’re on our way to get _Zuko?_ ” Aang asked in the morning. 

Katara focused on the clothes that she was folding. 

“We’re getting Team Avatar back together! Zuko was a late addition but he counts,” said Sokka. 

“You want me to go get my ex-girlfriend’s current boyfriend?” Aang asked. 

“I’m not your ex-girlfriend,” Katara muttered. 

“ _And_ ,” added Toph, “Zuko isn’t her current boyfriend.” 

Aang’s demeanor and face changed in an instant -- from defiant to hopeful. Katara could have strangled Toph. 

“Um!” Suki’s voice was high. She placed her hands on Toph’s shoulders. “Maybe we should give these two a moment.” Sokka, Suki, and Toph moved to Appa and began packing his saddle bags. 

“You’re not dating Zuko anymore?” Aang asked. 

Katara sighed. “I don’t know, Aang. I haven’t seen him in months.” 

“That doesn’t sound like dating.” 

“Hmm.” 

“If we were dating, I’d never let you be on your own for that long.” 

“What if I wanted to be alone?” 

“Well… then, yeah, sure. I guess. I’d do whatever _you_ wanted!” 

It was so simple with Aang. Whatever others needed, that was what he did. Was that a bad thing? It didn’t sound like it. It sounded like he would be a perfect, supportive boyfriend. It sounded like he would be cheerful and playful and easy. Not overly emotional, grouchy, and hard. Katara bit her lip and pictured charging across the campsite and laying one on him. 

The idea held no appeal. 

She sighed. “I’m sorry, Aang. I love you so much. But…” 

“Not like that,” Aang finished bitterly, repeating what she had said last time.

“I’m sorry,” Katara said again. 

“Don’t -- stop saying that. It doesn’t make anything better!” 

“I’m--” Katara caught herself. “I know. I just wish it could. I don’t like hurting you. Or… not being close to you. You’re my best friend.” 

Aang’s face twitched as he examined the ground. Finally he muttered, “You’re my best friend too.”

Katara wanted this to be the end, but she could tell that Aang wasn’t done. His next question enraged her: “Do you feel ‘ _like that_ ’ about Zuko?”

Sneaking out of the palace and through the empty capital city. Waterbending across the harbor until she found a tribe ship to bring her home. Crying the entire way. Sending a stupid letter. Getting an even stupider one back in response. And now, the boy she was trying not to hurt was begging her to hurt him. Was that what Aang wanted? To be absolutely devastated? Was that what it would take to finally back off? 

“Yes!” Katara exclaimed. “Yes, I do. I did. But I fucked it all up so it doesn’t matter. Everything that you felt for me, that you wanted me to feel back -- that’s what I felt for him. But I ran away when he needed me, so at least you can be happy that neither of us got what we wanted.” 

Aang was silent for a long time. Then he hoisted his rucksack over his shoulder and stomped towards Appa. “That doesn’t make me happy. You’re being a coward.” 

“Excuse me?!” 

Aang turned to face her. “You’re the one who taught me to be brave and believe in myself. It’s why I fell in love with you. But if you can’t even do those things yourself, then what’s the point?” 

Katara really, really wanted to shove Aang’s words back in his face. To make him feel as bad as he made her feel. Yet, there was nothing to say. She’d never been a very good liar. 

  
  


Zuko

_Green, Part 2_

Zuko growled and bunched up the parchment. He threw it onto the growing pile of discarded sentiments on the floor. Iroh made his way through the crowded shop to the back table where Zuko sat and tried to write. 

“Pressures of ruling?” Iroh asked. 

“The Earth King wants all the Fire Nation citizens out of his lands by the summer. How do I tell him that’s an incredibly stupid idea -- in a diplomatic way?” 

“Probably not like that.” Iroh sat down. 

“Hmph. I can’t convince anyone of anything in a letter.” 

“That is a very specific character flaw.” 

“No it isn’t.” 

“Does that have to do with a particular waterbender?” 

“No.” 

“A waterbending master who returned home… suddenly?” 

“No.” 

“Ah, my mistake.” 

“You left too,” Zuko said, crossing his arms over his chest and slouching in his seat. 

“People needed to see you as your own ruler,” Iroh said. “Anyway, I’m much better suited to this environment than a war room.” He raised his arms to the tea shop. 

Zuko couldn’t deny his uncle the tea shop or his dreams -- his uncle had always helped Zuko realize his. Zuko disagreed with his statement; Iroh would be extremely helpful in a war room. But hopefully, Zuko could keep that room empty for some time longer. Getting his generals and dukes to agree to that idea was challenging. They had all lived their entire lives at war. They knew nothing else. Now they had a new Fire Lord, one who believed their country had been in the wrong for a century. It was like being pulled in two. 

“But a ruler without someone to love is a lonely man indeed.” 

Zuko’s eyes burned but he made himself shrug. “She left. Pretty clear message.” 

“Perhaps,” Iroh allowed. “But people do odd things at times of great stress. Did I ever tell you about a young boy I met many years ago? He was forced to leave his home and decided that the best solution was to hunt an even younger boy, who had been dead for a hundred years, and take _him_ away from _his_ home.” Iroh sipped his tea, impervious to the golden glare. Zuko stood, scraping his chair backwards. 

“I have to go.”

“It is always good to see you, nephew!” Iroh told Zuko’s back. The guards that followed Zuko like twin shadows walked out behind him. Zuko understood the need for the guards. They weren’t so much for protection, though they were capable. The Fire Lord, as well as all heads of state, were always putting on a show. An entourage was part of that show. Zuko had tried to rid himself of them while he was at his uncle’s tea shop, a place where he could not be the Fire Lord for one afternoon, but they insisted. 

Zuko was wrapped up in his own mind, retorts and regrets circling, or else he certainly would have recognized the voice that said: “--it’ll be easy because the space sword is the only thing _not_ burned.” If Zuko had recognized that voice, he would have certainly deduced with whom the voice was speaking, and changed course immediately. But Zuko was too preoccupied, and he walked straight into a bald, thirteen year old boy. 

Aang and Zuko collided and both jerked back awkwardly. For a silent moment, Zuko, flanked by his guards, stood opposite Aang, Sokka, Toph, Suki, and Katara. For that moment, all were too stunned or awkward to say a word. For that one moment, Zuko felt like he should be bracing for an attack. His battle-instincts kicked in, noticing things like the Avatar’s relative distance from the rest of his friends, the fact that Sokka and Suki were unarmed, and the way that Katara shifted her weight to the balls of her feet. Fire burned in the unseen space, ready for Zuko to pull out and use. 

Then it all crashed away. His head sank forward. “Sorry,” he muttered, surprised to hear the ragged quality of his voice. 

“Hey.” Aang’s greeting was clouded. 

“You guys going to my uncle’s, Iroh’s shop?” 

“Yup,” said Toph. 

“That’s good. I mean, he’ll want to see you. I was going out. Bye.” 

Zuko pivoted ninety degrees and fast-walked down a nearby alley. He carefully kept his gaze fixed on the cobblestones and did not let himself look for a certain pair of blue eyes. His heart tried to jump into his throat -- which was stupid. She didn’t want to be with him. She didn’t feel anything at seeing him. He needed to stop feeling something for her. What did he expect? That she would ditch her friends and chase him down and yell--

“Zuko!” 

He turned and saw Katara jogging down the alleyway after him. His heart grew wings and tried to fly away. His vision turned dark. He could feel the fire burning again and there was no way to separate the angry flames from the elated ones. 

She came to a sudden halt several feet away. His guards took a respectful distance, one at each end of the alley. Katara followed them with her eyes. 

“Umm. Hi.” She twirled a stray lock of hair. 

“What?” Zuko demanded. 

“Oh. Umm. Nothing. I just thought--” 

“What? What did you think?” 

Katara only put up with hostility for so long, and she had suffered through two verbal jabs. Zuko watched her face change from open and uncertain to judging and defensive. It made him so happy he wanted to grin and take her hand. But he had started this conversation off on the wrong foot, and he didn’t particularly feel like righting it. She was the one who owed him an apology anyway. 

“Sorry if I intruded on your sulking time.” 

Zuko snorted. “Why would I be upset? Did a painful memory just walk through my path?” 

Katara crossed her arms. “Hmm. I can relate.” 

They squared off, arms crossed, eyeing each other up and down. Zuko reflected that there must be something seriously wrong with him if the sight of Katara hating him made his day brighter. But he couldn’t deny it, even being this close to her was electrifying. 

“I have to go pick something up,” he told her. She rolled her eyes in response and turned to go back to the tea shop. “Wanna come?” The question literally unbalanced her, and she did a little hop to catch herself. Zuko grinned, but not while Katara could see. She regarded him suspiciously, but nodded. 

Together they moved through Ba Sing Se. 

“Do you always have these guys?” she asked after a while. 

“Yup.” 

He could sense her distaste, but she said nothing. She was probably checking off another box in her “glad I’m not dating this guy” list. 

“You don’t have any protection? Your people didn’t try to -- I dunno, guard you?” 

“I don’t need help,” she said airly. “I’m plenty used to protecting myself.” 

Zuko could feel her veiled gibe. “Mm. I guess traveling with the Avatar is like having a guard dog.” 

A frustrated noise escaped Katara. 

“Unless you’re not traveling with him?” 

Katara stopped in the middle of the street, forcing Zuko and his guards to halt and retrace their steps. 

“Do you want to do this?” she demanded. “Because if you do, we can. But I’d rather you just came out with it instead of hiding behind stupid comments.” 

“Oh? I’m hiding? Sure. Still better than running away.” 

Katara’s cheeks turned red. “I didn’t run away.” 

“Really? Really?!” Zuko was aware that he was raising his voice on a busy street, while dressed as the Fire Lord. But he didn’t care. For the first time since his ascension to the throne, he didn’t care what people thought. “Then what do you call leaving in the middle of the night without saying goodbye?!” 

“You told me to leave!” Katara yelled back. 

Zuko shook his head, unable to comprehend what she had just said. “What are you talking about? Why would I tell you to leave? I was falling in love with you!” 

Katara took a literal step back, panic in her eyes. “Well. Clearly not enough.” 

“What does that mean?” 

Katara’s brow furrowed and she seemed to be losing steam. Zuko felt the opposite. He felt adrenaline seeping into his veins. He wanted to run, wanted to fight, wanted to take her into his arms.

“You told me that you’d never be accepted as Fire Lord with a Water Tribe girlfriend,” said Katara in a voice that was deadly serious. A voice that was perched on on a tightwire, with no net underneath. 

Zuko recoiled. He held up his hands. “No. I didn’t.” 

“Yes you did!” 

“When?”

“On our way to the capital! After you’d been bandaged by the White Lotus healers.” 

Zuko tried to think back. The journey from the capital and back was foggy. He’d been in so much pain from Azula’s bolt. His chest had been ripped open. Even Katara couldn’t fully heal him. He remembered being rushed into a white canvas medical tent and then everything went dark for a while. When he woke up, he was alone, strips of linen wrapped around his chest. Every breath was agony. But even worse than the pain, was the panic when he realized that he had been taken back to the Earth Kingdom. That was the last place he should have been. He needed to get back to the Fire Nation, needed to assume control before someone more dangerous did. 

Suddenly the memory dislodged from the dark recesses of his mind. He had found Katara. They had borrowed Appa. They had flown through the night. He felt like he was going to puke. She told him to rest. But every time he closed his eyes, he pictured Fire Nation citizens, his citizens, hating him. 

“I said they’d be confused,” Zuko said slowly. “That they might not recognize me, especially if I landed with a sky bison and a waterbender.” 

Katara’s face twisted, but she refused to drop his gaze. 

“But,” Zuko continued. “I didn’t mean -- I was in a lot of pain. I thought I wasn’t going to make it, wasn’t going to be a good Fire Lord. But I _never_ meant that I didn’t want you by my side. I would have done anything to have you there.” 

Katara stomped her foot and glared at the sky. The sun was setting, lighting up the clouds with purples and pinks. 

“I know,” she forced out. 

“Huh? You know what?” 

“I… I did run away. But--” suddenly her eyes were searing into his, begging him to understand. “I couldn’t bear for you to leave me. And it seemed like you might. You had a country to deal with. And you were so hurt.” A tear escaped her eye. She wiped it away with the back of her hand. “You don’t remember Zuko, but you were really hurt. I didn’t… it didn’t seem like you were gonna make it. Halfway back you lost consciousness. I couldn’t get you to wake up. And then when you did… you wanted to run right back.” 

“Hey,” Zuko reached out to touch her shoulder. 

Katara glanced at his guards. Then: “You were falling in love with me?” 

Zuko’s heart tattooed a furious beat on his ribcage. “Yes.” 

For one tense moment, they stayed, still as statues. Suddenly, Katara raised her arms and water -- from who knows where -- formed into a dense cloud of fog around them. She grabbed Zuko’s hand and tore off down a nearby alley. Zuko could hear his guards yell for him, but he didn’t respond. He ran faster, following Katara through a complex maze. Footsteps crashed behind them. He put his all into his legs. They darted down alleys, across streets, whipping around tight turns. At one alley, Katara took a sudden left and pulled them into a recessed doorway. They stood perfectly still, not daring to breathe, as they listened to the steel boots of his guards run past. 

Zuko let out a gasp and chuckled. Since becoming Fire Lord, he never did anything irresponsible anymore. Neither moved out of the doorway, and it occurred to Zuko that he should say something. Katara had taken the big step to get them here, get them alone. He searched his brain for something to say. He finally landed on the perfect phrase, only three words, but before he could get it out, Katara’s hand was on his cheek. She was pushing herself into him, pushing him against the door. 

Instinctively, he locked his arms around her back, held her face, felt her hair. Fire burned. He twisted them so that her back was pressed against the doorway, the rest of her pushed against him. Zuko gripped her hips and she looped a leg around his as if she could tie them together. Out of breath, Katara shifted her lips to his neck. He closed his eyes to enjoy that exquisite feeling. Her top was cropped in the style of a Fire Nation outfit. His index fingers rested on her bare skin, that warm brown skin that had so hypnotized him. Shaking, he raised his hands to graze her waist. Katara shivered. One of her hands slipped in between them, tracing the muscles of his chest. When her fingers grazed the hard knot of scar tissue, she broke away. 

“It’s fine,” he whispered. “All healed.” To prove his point, Zuko held her hand in place, pressed it down on the scar. He wondered if she could feel his heart going wild. 

“Sorry I ditched your guards,” she said. 

Zuko laughed and fell forward to lean on her shoulder. He kissed the soft skin between her neck and collarbone. She hugged him tightly, keeping him in place. 

“Literally anytime you want to do that, it’s fine with me,” he mumbled. 

“We should probably go back,” Katara whispered. 

“No.” 

“They’re gonna worry about you.” 

“I’m just fine.” 

Katara plucked one of Zuko’s hands from her waist and raised his wrist to her lips. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have run away from you.” 

“It’s okay. I forgive you.” 

She laughed. “That was easy.” 

“You’re very convincing.” 

Zuko raised his head and took her face in his hands. The pair stayed in the doorway until night had truly fallen. Stars winked in the sky and the smell of dozens of dinners being prepared wafted through the air. Neither Katara nor Zuko noticed these things. They inhabited a happy bubble separate from the world. Both would have happily stayed there all night, except the door they were leaning up suddenly sprang open. 

An old noodle shop owner beheld the scene that had been happening against her backdoor and squwaked at the two teenagers, shooing them away. She didn’t recognize the Fire Lord or the waterbending master. She only saw two hormonal kids hiding out in her alley. It was enormously freeing. 

Zuko took Katara’s hand as they wandered down the alley, back to the main street. 

“Back to the tea shop?” 

“Umm. Weren’t you in the middle of an errand?” 

“It’s funny that you should mention that… Still wanna come?” 

They walked hand in hand through Be Sing Se as it transitioned from day to night. Cafes spilled out onto the streets. Street musicians filled the air with a strange blend of music. Lanterns added to the starlight. It all seemed like magic to Zuko. 

When they got to the jeweler, he was closing his shop. At first the man was annoyed to be bothered by customers, but after Zuko stated who he was, the shopkeeper jumped to open his store for the Fire Lord. The jeweler ran to the back and retrieved what Zuko had bought months and months ago. Zuko thanked him and led Katara back outside. A warm summer breeze tingled against his skin. 

He held the package out to her. “It’s for you.” 

Though she smiled, she was confused. “I don’t know that I earned a present.” 

Zuko shrugged. “I got it a while ago. But he just finished it. Open it.” 

Katara unwrapped the plain brown paper and revealed a ring. It was entirely made from green stone, cut and polished to sparkle. But it wasn’t an emerald, or any other typical gem. Zuko was glad they had arrived after dark. It made it clear where the stone was from. In the dark street, it glowed with its own light. Katara turned to him. 

“Is this…” 

“Yeah. The caverns underneath the city. I kept a stone from when…” Zuko trailed off. “I know that might seem like a weird symbol, since we didn’t exactly leave those caves as friends.” He scratched his head. “But… without our time together down there, I don’t know if I would have found the courage to leave the Fire Nation at all. You made me brave enough. So I thought--” 

Zuko didn’t get to tell her what he thought. Katara wrapped her arms around him and kissed him again. It wasn’t as long or as intimate as before, but there was plenty of time for that. He was just ecstatic to be close to her. 

Katara slipped the ring onto her middle finger. It was too small to light up a room, or even read by, but it was just bright enough to attract the eye. She glanced up at him, her blue eyes reflecting the green light. Zuko didn’t know that, to Katara, his golden irises looked exactly the same. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading all the way until the end and indulging my Zutara obsession. Let know know what you thought or what you think I should write next in the comments. I had so much fun with this one and I'm not ready to leave the Avatar world just yet!


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